Love Isn't Something You Get Over
by BubbleLove1234
Summary: *ON HOLD* James had always loved Lily, but she's always hated his guts. But what happens between them when her hatred waivers and a few bets are put in place? Read and find out! Sucky summary, of course, but great story! Promise! PLEASE R&R!
1. In Your Dreams

**A/N: Chapter one! Please read and reply so I know I have readers!**

**Disclaimer: Everything and everyone in the Harry Potter Universe is not owned by me, except for Rebecca Bensons (I made her up.) Please give all credit to J.K. Rowling, and how about we make this the disclaimer for the rest of story, yeah?**

_**Chapter 1 – In Your Dreams**_

**LILY P.O.V.**

A small, satisfied smile tickled at my lips as I breathed in the familiar smells of the Hogwarts Express. The fumes and sights were always so comforting when summer ended, and it was finally time to go back to my real home. Petunia and her new boyfriend Vernon had really gotten on my nerves this summer, so that's why most of my summer was spent locked up in my bedroom, reading _Hogwarts: A History_ or my favorite muggle book _Tuck Everlasting_, hoping that maybe Petunia would just marry the bloke and move in with him soon so I could eat dinner with my mom and dad for once.

My heart gave a not-so-gentle squeeze, and I inhaled sharply. Where had I gone wrong? Why couldn't Petunia just accept who I was so we could become friends like we were before? It wasn't my fault I was a witch and she wasn't, and she just need to get over it.

But I shook my head – this wasn't the time or place to be thinking about something upset me. I was going home and would be seeing my best friends soon. The smile returned, even brighter, when I thought of my two best friends, Alice Longrie and Rebecca Bensons. Of course, I had other friends at Hogwarts, but Alice and Rebecca had been the first I ever made. I would never forget the day because A) it had been one of the happiest days of my life (receiving the Hogwarts letter was in first place) and B) it had been one of the worst days of my life; happiest because I had met Alice and Rebecca that day, the day the best friendship had begun, and worst because I had the most arrogant, annoying prat that day, the day all hopes of peace were burned - the day I met James William Potter.

_Flashback_

_"Evans, Lily!"_

_My heart pounded fast when I heard my name leave Professor McGonagall's mouth, and, gulping, I made my way up the staircase to sit on the stool._

_I closed my eyes, not able to stare back at everyone's curious faces without hyperventilating, as the hat was placed carefully onto my red hair. Nothing happened at first, but then a small voice appeared, whispering its thoughts._

_"Hmm… Interesting, very interesting. You are loyal, like a Hufflepuff, but indeed, that is not the right spot for you. You are quick-witted and smart – Ravenclaw would do you good – but, alas, that is not the place for you either… You are as cunning as Slytherin, but definitely would not make it there. Thus, leaving the only choice…"_

_"GRYFFINDOR!!!"_

_I gave a sigh of relief and jumped off the stool, hurrying towards the cheering Gryffindor table. I saw a few familiar faces, one of which I knew I already disgusted – Sirius Black. He was the only decent Black, but he was still a nuisance and he was friends with a small, messy haired boy in our year whom I had not gotten the name for yet. Sirius was waving me towards him, thinking that _I_ would sit with _him_. Ha! As if!_

_I gave him a dirty look and flounced over to first year girls, who, luckily, were sitting far away from him. "Do you think I could sit here?" I asked timidly, playing with the ends of my hair nervously._

_They both nodded enthusiastically, and I took a seat beside them._

_"So what's your name?" one of them asked me, whispering as to not draw attention to herself from McGonagall, who was calling up the rest of the students._

_"Lily Evans," I said._

_"Cool! I love that name." She smiled. "I'm Alice Longrie, and this" she indicated the girl on my other side. "is Rebecca Bensons." I smiled, urging her to continue talking because I had no interest in talking or watching the ceremony. She got the message clearly, and continued. "So, what's one fact about you? It helps me to know these things because I have trouble remembering new people, so if I know something important about you I'll remember you more easily."_

_I giggled at this funny piece of news, but answered the question anyways. "Well, I'm muggle. That should help," I laughed, jokingly._

_"Really? Me too!" Rebecca had turned back to us, and joined the conversation. I nodded warmly at her, overjoyed at the prospect of making new friends._

_"Ooo, look at that _cutie_! He better be a Gryffindor!" Alice breathed, staring at a messy dark haired boy with glasses. I went quiet beside her, fury bubbling inside me. This was the same boy who had made fun of Severus and I on the train, along with Sirius. Focusing all my energy on him, I hoped willing him into Ravenclaw would work._

_I watched him walk up to the stool and sit down, his face too smug for my liking. It was as if the boy thought he just knew _everything!_ Well, news flash for him – he doesn't._

_Barely five seconds had passed before the hat hollered the house. "GRYFFINDOR!!!"_ _My stomach dropped, feeling like it would fall out of my butt. Was I really going to have to spend the next seven years of school dealing with that prat? What was this hat thinking, sending him to Gryffindor? It was like sending him to his death sentence!_

_~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~_

_"Ahem," someone coughed from behind me while I sat next to Alice and Rebecca enjoying the feast after the ceremony. I turned around in my seat, wondering who had come over to talk to me. My interest quickly vanished when I saw who stood behind me – the messy haired boy._

_"Yes?" I muttered darkly, not able to contain a steady voice._

_"You see," he started, the smug smile on his face again. "I noticed that you were a muggle, and"_

_I shot him a deathly glare. "Really? Is that a problem?"_

_I watched with satisfaction as some of his confidence drained his face. "No! No, no, I was just think that since you don't know this world as well, that I could, you know, help you around." He winked suggestively, and I thought for sure I would puke right then and there._

_"Actually, I'm quite fine on my own, thank you. So if you'll excuse me, I would like to finish my dinner in peace, without _you_ ruining it for me!" I smiled half-heartedly, and swung back around._

_But he didn't leave. "Well, I could at least know your name?"_

_"Uh, no?" I said, not moving a fraction towards him._

_"She's Lily Evans!" I heard Alice blurt out from beside me. Sending a quick scowl her way, I turned back to the boy, who was now smiling gratefully at Alice._

_"Nice, I'm James Potter by the way," he said, holding a hand out to me. When I didn't take it automatically, he pulled it back automatically, taking it through his hair. "Anyways, if you need anything, Evans, you know where to find me." Sending one last wink my way, he strutted back to his seat where he sat with Sirius Black and another boy who looked sick from his overwhelming paleness._

_"Looks like you've got yourself a crush, Miss Evans!" Rebecca chorused while Alice laughed at my dumbstruck face._

_End Flashback_

Oh, and how true Becca had been, but if only we had figured out how deep this crush went for James then maybe I could've found a way to scare him away. Now, even in sixth year, he was still trying to make a move on me. Something's just don't change.

Straining my neck, I looked around the platform for Rebecca's dirty blonde hair or Alice's shiny black hair in the crowds. Luckily for me, it didn't take long.

"LILY!" I heard someone scream from within the crowd of students and parents, and out of nowhere two girls slammed into me. "Lily! I'm so glad to see you! I've missed you so much!" they both squealed, wasting no time to get to the hugging part.

"Hey, guys," I gasped, prying their arms off of me. "Missed you too."

"Well, come on! We have to find a good compartment before they're all gone!" Alice said, dragging both Becca and me behind her as she ran with her trolley towards the train.

On the train, we looked inside each compartment, hoping our favorite would be empty by the time we got to it. It was the same compartment we always sat in every year since the beginning of second year. But it wasn't as easy as claiming it your territory, as some might think – annually we must get on the train early enough to stake our temporary claim on it. This plan was foolproof and had not once failed us.

So, of course it came as a shock to me when we reached our compartment and Alice whipped around, plain horror etched across her face.

"Um, how about we sit somewhere else this year, girls?" she said awkwardly, blocking both Becca and I's path. "I mean, it would be nice for a change, you know?"

I eyed her curiously. "Why? What's wrong with our compartment?"

"N-nothing! Nothing. At. All. Just in the mood for a change, that's all!"

"Oh, come off it, Alice. We know something's up! Just tell us already!" Becca rolled her eyes, trying to push past Alice's outstretched arms.

With Becca distracting Alice's other arm, I decided to push past. Ignoring her protests, I opened the compartment door and froze.

"Ah, perfect! Now the train ride is complete!" James smiled playfully, wiggling his eyebrows and patting on the seat beside him.

"I warned you!" I heard Alice's soft whisper from behind, but ignored it as I glared at James.

"Come one, guys, let's find a different compartment," I muttered, turning to leave.

"Oh, please, Lils," Becca said, rolling her eyes that were sparkling with excitement and glee. "Don't let them kick us out of our compartment! We can sit here if we want!" And with that she plopped herself down in the empty seat across from Sirius, sending him a quick, flirty smile before looking expectantly at Alice and I. Yes, my friend was a huge flirt when it came to boys, but I love her all the same.

Alice shrugged and sat down beside Remus, glancing anxiously between James and I. I groaned inwardly, and dragged myself to the only empty seat – the seat next to Potter. I put as much space between us as possible, but made sure not to sit too close to Peter, the odd boy that had somehow managed to become a part of the Marauders group in first year.

"So, my sweet Lily-flower, how was your summer?" James whispered when the others talked animatedly between each other about their summers.

I glanced at him from the corner of my eye, jumping when I realized just how close his face was to mine. My eyes darted to his lips. They looked soft and perfect, and when I looked at the rest of his face, I found myself using the same words to describe him. His cheeks were slightly flushed, but whenever I talked to him, they were so that didn't come as any surprise to me. But what really stood out were his eyes – they were hazel, but not the normal hazel I always see. His were different, with a ring of dark green around the edge, and tints of blue and yellow here and there splashed across the brown. It was unique and breath-taking. And as hard as I tried to push the feeling away, I felt a warm feeling of trust stir in me as I stared into them.

Never the less, I still glared at him, still angry that he'd had the nerve to steal the compartment. "It was just fine until you came along," I practically hissed. I watched sadness flicker across his face, but then it was gone to be replaced by a smirk and I wondered if the sadness I'd seen had actually been there before.

"Oh, silly Evans," he laughed, his breath warm on my cheek. I blushed furiously, unable to breathe. "If only you knew how much your words hurt me."

I whipped my head to look him directly in the eye, the same feeling of trust and safety spreading throughout my body, and looked to see if there was any trace of sarcasm on his face. But there was none, pure sincerity. "If it hurts you so much then _leave_," I whispered angrily, still scowling.

"Sorry, love – no can do. You're stuck with me forever." Then he turned away, smiling, to join in on everyone else's conversation.

I just stared at him, angry and happy at the same time at his words. Understanding already why I would be angry at him for saying that, I decided to try and understand the possibility of actually being _happy_ that I would be stuck with him for life. Why in the world would this please me? I hated his guts! I should be outraged at the thought of actually having to deal with him for a lifetime. I should be slapping him in the face for even thinking for a moment that he would ever be around me after we graduated from school. But no – instead I was almost happy at the thought. Every day, waking up knowing he would be there with me, to comfort me when I'm upset or to protect me when we're in danger. He was the one I saw in all of those moments-

Whoa! Whoa, whoa! Stop, Lily, stop! You hate him remember? You should only be imagining anyone other than Potter being with you in ten years. Don't let him trick you like that! He only wants in your pants – that's _all_.

Silently, I agreed with the voice in the back of my head. Of course – what was wrong with me, thinking I could ever be with James Potter? If I ever gave him the chance, he would only try to get in my pants then turn around and boast to the whole of Hogwarts. No, I would never give him a chance to do that to me. Sighing, I turned away from him, and began talking to Alice about our summers.

**JAMES P.O.V.**

The train ride was very uneventful, other than the few times that I caught Lily looking at me from over shoulder. Each time my stomach would do a somersault, but before I could say something to her, she would catch me staring back and look away, her cheeks blushing like crazy. I smiled smugly to myself. Maybe this would be the year I finally got the girl…

Instantly, I internally slapped myself. I couldn't waste my time getting my hopes up, no matter how much I wanted those looks she gave me to be stares of longing for me. She was a dangerous woman, she was, and I had to play my cards carefully as to make sure I didn't do something stupid.

"Oi, James, you coming?" Sirius's voice roused me from my reverie, and I looked around. Everyone was gone, including Lily, and Sirius was waiting for me at the door.

I nodded, and hurried out with him, elated at the thought of being at Hogwarts once again. The feast was so close, and I couldn't help but smile idiotically while I imagined what food I would be eating thirty minutes from now.

"Sirius!" Rebecca Bensons' voice carried over the heads of the other students, and automatically Sirius' head snapped up. "You and Potter are sharing a carriage with us, so get your arses over here!"

I watched a smile develop on his face, and laughed. His emotions were always so obvious.

Once in the carriage, I looked around for a seat, smiling when, once again, the only open seat was next to Lily. She looked downright pissed, but I just grinned at her and took a seat next to her. Wrapping one arm around her shoulders, I whispered in her ear, "Just can't get enough of me, can you, Evans?"

She pushed me away, slapping my arm with as much force as she could, leaving a red mark on my arm. Still, I continued to smile like an idiot, but didn't try to wrap an arm around her again. Though, much to my amusement, she kept glancing at me every so often from the corner of her eye. Maybe I was making some progress?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"And with that, you may leave to your beds, as I imagine many of you are tired!" Dumbledore's voice echoed through the Great Hall, as he smiled warmly down at the students.

Screeches and talking exploded all over from students scooting out their stools and chatting with their friends. I scanned the hall quickly for Lily and her friends, making sure they were leaving also, and when I saw the flaming red hair, I smiled satisfied and followed Remus, Sirius, and Peter out of the hall and to our dorm.

"So, Padfoot," I said jokingly as we sat in our dorm. "You and Rebecca sure did seem cozy in the carriage earlier."

His face reddened, either with embarrassment or anger – or both. "She was cold, so I gave her my coat and scooted closer! It was nothing, seriously!" he cried. "And anyway, you and Evans sure seem to be getting along _great_." He smirked.

This time, my cheeks burned. "Hey, I actually think I'm making progress. She hasn't tried to insult me _once _tonight - which is odd, because I actually made physical contact with her earlier and all she did was slap my arm…" Subconsciously, my hand moved to the afflicted arm, and rubbed it. It still stung, but I've gotten worse from her.

"You're both idiots…" Remus muttered from where he laid on his bed.

"Ah, Remus, you know you're just insanely jealous of our amazing lady skills." Sirius wiggled his eyebrows, and I burst out laughing because, one, he couldn't ever stay with one girl for long without cheating on them and them finding out, and I had been chasing after the one girl who hated my guts for the past six years. In other words, our 'lady skills' were like that of a ten year old.

Remus just rolled his eyes, and turned out the lights next to his bed. In seconds, Sirius and I could hear his snores, along with Peter's, who had been out since we got to our dorm.

"So, Prongs, what's your genius plan to get Evans this year?" Sirius yawned, and I shot him and glare.

"I don't _need_ a plan, Padfoot," I said. "I can just wing it."

He snorted. "Riiigghht, and then you're just magically going to make her love you? Seriously, man, what's the plan?"

I sighed irritably. This guy had absolutely no faith in me. "You don't think I can get her," I said in disbelief.

"Not without a plan you can't," he muttered from across the room. "You can't think like a human being when you're around her, so how are you ever going to be able to 'wing it'?"

I gaped. "That's not true! My thoughts are perfectly human when I'm near her, I just can't manage to speak normally."

"My point exactly."

I glared at the ceiling while silence passed between us. How could he question my abilities like that? Of course I could wing it with her! Merlin, I'm James frigin' Potter!

"I'll tell you what." Sirius sat up, and looked at me. "If you can wing it with absolutely _no_ planning and actually get her by the end of the year then I will cut five inches of my hair (I smiled ear to ear at this – Sirius' hair was his most prized possession, and he never let scissors near it unless they were professional scissors; at least I know he's actually taking my dilemma seriously) _but_ if you can't then _you_ shave _your_ head."

I gaped at him. He really did have no faith in me. "You're a bloody git, but you have a deal. I'll prove to you that I _can_ get Evans and before you know it, we'll be together and your hair will be as short as mine."

He smirked, lying back down. "In your dreams, Prongs."

"Sorry, but Evans is already occupying them, so I guess it'll just have to become a reality," I joked, and laughed quietly when I heard him gasp. This year was definitely going to be interesting.


	2. Friends

**A/N: I couldn't wait any longer to write more! I was going to wait for tomorrow but…dah! I couldn't handle it! So luckily for you, here's Chapter 2!**

_**Chapter 2 – **_

LILY P.O.V.

"So, Lils, I couldn't help but notice that you were almost being civil towards Potter!" Becca said, smirking as she poured herself a cup of orange juice. We were sitting in the Great Hall eating our breakfast, excited for the first day of classes. Of course we had been doing this peacefully – until Becca brought up Potter, the one person I'd been avoiding thinking about all morning. I didn't know what the reason was, but I felt that if I did think about him, I wouldn't be as happy as I was now (or at least ten seconds ago.)

I scowled, stopping my cereal filled spoon halfway to my mouth. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"What she _means_," Alice butted in, knowing that if Becca said something wrong (which she was most likely to do), I would give them both the cold shoulder for the rest of the day. And I couldn't blame her for wanting to make that didn't happen – I am quite mean when I give people the silent treatment. "Is that maybe you could try to be friends this year? Friends with Potter, I mean?" she said, smiling at me hopefully.

Becca almost sprayed the mouthful of orange juice she had all over us. "_What?_" she choked, tears coming from her bulging eyes. "_Lily _– our Lily – be _friends_ with _Potter_? Are you insane?!" Alice just stared at her, looking partly scared and amused at the same time. "Alice, I know you mean well, but…really? I know Lily's smart, but she doesn't have _that_ much self-control! No offence, Lils," she added quickly.

Slightly angry and curious, I glanced back and forth between the two girls, hardly able to believe that that was really what they thought of me. Seeing their sincere faces, I gasped. "Girls, that is way untrue! I have plenty of self-control!" I insisted.

Becca rolled her eyes. "'Course you do, honey, and I'm lesbian." My mouth dropped at her harsh sarcasm. "Oh, please, Lily! You can't actually think you have enough self-control to be civil towards Potter. I know you feel a bit bummed hearing this, but there's nothing you can do to change who you are! You're just naturally repulsed by Potter, so – naturally – you can't ever be considerate towards him." She shrugged, like the fact was a small matter, and continued drinking her orange juice.

Alice continued to watch the situation at hand warily, ready to jump in any moment if it got out of hand. I just fumed, anger and disbelief just oozing from me. How dare Becca accuse _me_, out of all people, of having no self-control? I mean, really, she was the one that I found in a broom cupboard with a random guy every week when I went on patrol with Remus! If she thinks _she_ has self-control, then she has lost her mind.

"I have plenty of self-control!" I repeated through my gritted teeth. "Prove that I don't!"

This time she really did spray the juice all over the table. After wiping her face and muttering a few sorry's to the people near us that had had their food showered with orange juice and her saliva, she turned back to me with amazement clear on her fair face. "Prove that…!" She looked at Alice in exasperation, who merely shrugged as if to say 'Don't drag me into this.' I continued to scowl at her, silently afraid that this frown would become permanently etched onto my face. "Lils, I love you and all, and this may come as shocker to you – trust me, it was to _everyone_ – but over the years people have come to notice that when it comes to your and James' relationship, you can't help _but_ be vulgar towards him. It's a fact of life; it's the way of life. It's like the one thing in this school that can't _ever_ change."

Believe it or not, I actually glared harder. "I can to be nice to him, I just choose not to because he is such an arrogant git," I said simply. Because it was that simple – I was only horrible to him because he was a bloody git. Gits don't deserve to be respected. It was one of the most important rules in my rule book (number one being 'Gits don't deserve a girl like me.')

"In other words, you're just so worked up about something that happened _six years ago, _you can't bear to even try and get to know the bloke." Before she knew it, Becca had said the words that she had been silently thinking about ever since James last asked Lily out and Lily had screamed what a git he was, even though he had asked her out in the sweetest way possible. Her eyes widened as she saw the rage on my face, and she immediately began to apologize. "Lily, I didn't mean it, I-"

But I was already up and walking towards Professor McGonagall, asking for my timetable, then hurrying out of the Great Hall without so much as glance in Becca's direction.

When I reached an empty hall, I paused to catch my breath. When I made angry departures, I really used a lot of my energy for them. Closing my eyes, I rested my head in my palms, sliding down the wall and sitting on the cold stone floor.

She was wrong. Becca was way off the mark about my hatred towards Potter. I could be civil around him, and I most definitely could get to know the person that hid behind the mask of a conceited prat. He just never gave me a proper chance to do so; what with the constant pranks and bullying he did in the halls of Hogwarts and the way he asked me out ever hour. How is any girl going to think of him as a mature person, let alone the fact that each girl he went out with he treated like dirt? I was only being my sensible self by avoiding him at all costs. I had even tried to save myself by being incredibly rude to him every time he was in my presence, but not even then did he go away. But now it was out of habit and pure loathe towards him.

And how could she even bring up what happened in first year? I winced slightly at the memory - looking for apartments on the Hogwarts Express with Severus Snape then being interrupted rudely by two annoying little boys, one with shaggy dark hair and the other with messy jet black hair and glasses. They, without any reason to, had made fun of both Severus and I, calling Sev greasy (well, he was but it wasn't his fault – his home life was hard for him) and giving him the horrible nickname 'Snivellus,' and teasing me for wanting to look for compartments somewhere else with Severus. They had been absolutely cruel. It was our first year already Severus had become an outcast. That was something I would never forgive them for, even if I wasn't friends with Snape anymore.

My breath caught in my throat as I remembered the innocent days of first year when I could hang out with him. I missed them so much. _Don't go there, Lily – he's a foul person and doesn't deserve your time or care. Just forget him already_, the voice in the back of my head said angrily. I shook my head, agreeing, going back to the situation I was in.

Was I going to let Becca get to me, or was I going to prove her wrong? I smiled to myself thinking over the idea of actually becoming friends with James Potter. It would be a load off of my mind and would make N.E.W.T's that much easier. No doubt, Alice wouldn't feel guilty about hanging out with them anymore. The idea was becoming more and more enlivening the more I thought it over.

So that was it – I was going to be friends with James Potter. It was foreign territory, but I could manage it, so long as I was being a self-controlled person.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Walking into my first class (Transfiguration), I looked around. There were two minutes left until class started, and now there weren't any good seats left. _This is why come early_, I thought irritably, as I scanned the classroom for an empty seat. I found Becca and Alice already in their seats and my stomach plummeted. Today wasn't going at all as I had expected it to be (I mean, really – last year I would have let what Becca said go without a second thought, and now I was going to try and become friends with the one person I hate the most.)

Finally, my eyes found an empty chair, and I ran towards it eagerly, not checking to see who sat beside the chair. When I got there, however, I sighed inwardly. My partner was James Potter. The universe must really want me to keep to my word.

"Um, can I sit here?" I asked uncertainly. Even after all the years he's asked me out, declaring his so-called-love for me every minute of the day, I still couldn't be sure whether or not he actually liked me as a person. I mean, I wouldn't if someone humiliated me day after day every time I asked them out.

His head snapped up in surprise, as if he had been in a daydream of some sort, and shock flickered across his face. I smiled warmly at him and took a seat just as Professor McGonagall came walking through the doors.

"Good morning, class," she said, as she began to scribble notes for us to copy on the blackboard. Pulling out a few pieces of parchment paper, I copied down every word she wrote.

Halfway through the lecture, I looked to my left through the corner of my eye to look at James. He was staring at me, almost drooling, with his mouth agape. Was I really so rude to him, it was so surprising I would sit next to him? _Duh!_ I smiled at the voice, but continued to watch James until I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled out another piece of parchment, and scribbled on it quickly before throwing it onto his half of the table.

_Get your head out of your ass, Potter, and pay attention!_

I watched him grin sheepishly and write something back.

_Of course, Lily Bear._

I shook my head, still smiling, knowing this would be the last time I got the nerve to ask him, and began writing back.

_Hey, I need to talk to you after class – meet me outside, 'kay?_

_Got it._

I giggled realizing what a shocker this was for him. He was probably hyperventilating. First I sit next to him, then I pass him notes, and even ask to talk to him after class all on my own free will. Maybe being friends wouldn't be as tough as I thought…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"So, Evans, you needed to talk?" James said as we stood face to face outside of the classroom.

I blushed furiously and hesitated. Was I really going to do this? What if it didn't work? What if he didn't even want to be friends? My heart missed a beat on the last question. _What if he didn't even want to be friends?!_ I would look like an idiot that's what. _Oh, come on, Lily – the boy has been chasing you for six years only to be rejected cruelly each time. Nothing he says to you can live up to that kind of humiliation that you've put him through, so just hurry up and ask!_

"Well, first of all," I started, avoiding eye contact. "I wanted to say sorry."

He cocked his head to side in confusion. "Sorry…?" he asked, not quite understanding what I meant.

"Sorry for being so…you know…bitchy to you all these years," I laughed nervously, already feeling idiotic. But he just smiled.

"Decided that you've been PMSing for too long, huh?" he joked, and surprisingly enough I smiled.

"I was wondering if maybe you wanted to start over?" I searched his eyes, looking for any signs of hatred or disbelief in them. All I found was kindness and warmth. "Just forget the past, and start anew. I'm getting sick of the hateful insults – it really tires me out having to think up new ones every day. What I'm trying to say is…" I knew I was rambling, but I couldn't help it. His eyes were just so mesmerizing that it was hard to concentrate on what I was trying to say. Shaking my head to clear it, I stared back into his eyes trying to regain control of the conversation. "Do you think we could be friends?"

His jaw dropped. I knew that would happen, but seeing it in reality just made it worse. Of course he didn't want to be friends. He's been trying to be more than that for six years, why in the name of Merlin would he want to less?

I closed my eyes, feeling like a loser just standing there while he just stared at me incredulously. "I knew it," I muttered to myself before raising my voice for him to hear. "It's okay, you don't have to say yes. I've treated you horribly for so long, I don't blame you for not wanting to be friends now. Well, um, this is awkward… But… I guess, uh, I'll see you…later…" I turned swiftly and started to leave, but then his hand grabbed my shoulder.

"No, wait!" I heard him cry. Turning back slowly, a smile tickling at my lips, I faced him again. "I-I do want to be…friends with you," he said, smiling ear to ear. "Just threw me off guard for minute there. I thought you were apologizing because you were going to be committing suicide later. You suggesting that we be friends was the last thing on my brain… Wow, this is great!"

I grinned, glad I had been wrong. Of course he wanted to be friends! What had I been thinking? He's been chasing me all these years, and I practically just gave him the key to my house (if you thought the way he did.) He's not going to turn down the chance of being friends just because he wants more. My stomach lurched. Crap, now I had to set some boundaries for him…

"But just so we're clear – we are _friends_," I stressed the word, hoping it got through his thick head. "Just _friends_. And we are _friends_ that don't ask each other out because that would just ruin the relationship, got it? _Friends_."

His smile tone downed after that, but he smiled none the less. "Right, Evans, _friends_," he said, copying my emphasis on the word.

I rolled my eyes. "You can call me Lily."

"What?"

"Lily – that's my name, you know. Not Evans." I smirked.

"Lily," he tested out the change, and smiled more. "Great, and you know I do too. It starts with a 'J' and ends with an 'S.' Any guesses on what it is?"

I stared at him in fake confusion, and doubled over laughing at his hurt expression.

"Now that was just cruel, Evans. My name is James," he added hurriedly, still unsure whether or not it had been a joke or if I really didn't know what his real name is.

"Hey, I thought we established that my name is _Lily_?" I elbowed him playfully as we headed to Herbology together laughing.

"Ah, but when you insult me, I still reserve the right to call you by your maiden name," he said, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. A shock of electricity was sent through me at his touch, and my brain went into hyper mode. Was this friendly holding or not? Had he not gotten the message? But all my fears disappeared when I realized he wasn't walking next to me anymore. Actually he wasn't anywhere near me. I looked around wildly.

But he was farther ahead, yelling to me, "I'll see you in class!" as he ran over to a tall blonde that was waiting for him.

My hands curled into fists, and anger bubbled in my veins. I recognized the girl as a seventh year Ravenclaw – Suzie Meadowes, a.k.a. the slut of the school. She has been with half of the school's male population, maybe more, and now she was going for James? I knew deep in my heart it wasn't my right to be angry about this, but I couldn't help myself. James was my friend (new or not – technicalities don't matter), and I knew she was going to hurt him. He didn't deserve it.

But I just rushed past them, ignoring the sloppy noises of their snogging, and ignored the sting in my eyes. I didn't need to cry – why would I? It was just James bloody Potter; he could go ahead and hurt himself as much as he wanted, and I wouldn't give a damn. Never. Not once will anyone catch me, Lily Rose Evans, caring if James went off with some skank and got hurt.

Never.

JAMES P.O.V.

It was like I was floating. I was on Cloud Nine, spinning in happy circles, grinning like an idiot.

_Lily Evans wants to be friends!_ I thought for the eighty-fifth time that day, as I gazed at the back of her red head in Potions, the last class of the day. I'd been a bit angry when she said it, I admit, but not at her – at me. Here I am chasing her daily and getting rejected heartlessly each time, and then here she comes wanting to be friends. I could've made her wait like I had, made her feel how idiotic I did when I asked her out, but I didn't. I said yes automatically. It was like Sirius had said – I was whipped.

But his face had been priceless when I told him the news. I could have sworn I saw a trace of fear when I said it, but passed it off as shock. And who wouldn't be? I was now friends with Lily Evans!

I jumped when a piece of balled up paper landed in front of me. Suspiciously, I unfolded it, and read curiously.

_**No matter how hard you stare, she still won't go out with you. – Padfoot**_

___Course not – that wouldn't be winging it now would it?_

_**Ah, just give it up, will you? You're not going to get her this year. Maybe next year but not this year.**_

___And give you the satisfaction? Sorry, but I like having a whole head of hair. And as a matter of fact, I really do think this is the year I get Lily._

_**Ok, one – I promise you that you will probably look a whole lot better with a shiny head; and two – since when do you call Evans Lily???**_

___Since she told me to._

_**She **_**told**_** you to call her Lily? Prongs, I truly believe this girl has lost her marbles. You didn't slip her a love potion did you?**_

_Of course I didn't! I would never do that. She is doing all of this on her own free will._

_**Hmm… Odd.**_

"Potter, Black, passing notes?" Professor Slughorn approached our table, frowning down on us. "Tsk, tsk, hand them over." He held out his hand expectantly.

My face reddened. "Um, actually, sir…"

"Hand them over, Potter."

"You see, I really think-"

"Potter, give them to me or a week of detention!"

Taking a deep breath, I handed the piece of paper over unwillingly, waiting for him to read it aloud to the class.

Which horrifyingly he did.

I watched Lily carefully, wondering what would happen to our one-day old friendship now. She tensed as Slughorn got farther down the note, and I knew it was over. I had officially ruined the best thing to happen to me in more than three years.

I was an idiot and I knew it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"LILY! Wait!" I yelled, trying to catch up with the red head while trying to dodge the tiny first and second years in the process. I was just a few feet away, so close… Yes!

I snatched her shoulder and spun her around to face me. "No, please listen!" I cried desperately as she tried to get away. She paused, not looking at me, but not running either so that was good. "I'm sorry – so sorry – about the note! I didn't mean for that to be seen! No, I mean…" I racked my brain helplessly, trying to make the look of pure hatred disappear on her perfect face. "It's just out of old habit! No, that's not it…"

"Potter," she said coolly, and I stopped talking instantly. What happened to first names? "Remember what I told you this morning? We're _friends_, nothing more, and we never will. So, please, just get the idea out of your head. _Friends – _that is all that we will _ever_ be!"

I froze because A) fortunately, she still saw me as a friend and B) unfortunately, she still saw me as a friend – nothing more. My hand dropped from her shoulder, and I nodded solemnly. "That's…good."

She stared at me, as if wanting to say more, but then turned swiftly away to head to the common room. I stayed there for awhile as the students left the hallway, and soon I was standing there alone, lost in thought. Was that all that were ever going to be? Just friends? Was this a lost battle that I was fighting? Was I really that daft to have thought that could ever be more?

Suddenly I felt a chill inside of me, starting in my chest and working its way to my fingertips and toes. Friends – _that is all we will _ever_ be!_ Her words replayed again and again in my head until I was numb and couldn't feel any pain from hearing them anymore. She wanted friends? Well, that's what she would get.

**A/N: Long enough? Haha! Hope you liked it! Please R&R!**

**And thank you ****Lady Friday, and HPITBBE for the comments! I really appreciate it! And thanks dancingfeet329 for favoriting (I know, I know – it's not a word!) the story!**


	3. Giving Up

**A/N: Yay, it's up! Enjoy and remember the golden rule – Read and Reply!!!**

_**Chapter 3 – Giving Up**_

LILY P.O.V.

The next week wasn't as pleasant as I had expected it to be. I still wasn't over James' and Sirius' note in Potions, which didn't make me in an entirely great mood. What did they mean about keeping a whole head of hair? Or what's with this 'winging it' business? Was I missing something here??

But after my talk with James after class, he seemed to…change. It was unnerving and relaxing at the same time, but I couldn't help but think that something was up. He wasn't flirting over the top like usual, and he wasn't harassing students in the halls. Instead he was actually acting like a…friend. To me. He never tried to wrap his arm around me anymore, or ask me out. He did nothing. It was like he was there, just not all the way.

And I hated it.

He was supposed to be in love with me! So why the hell wasn't he acting like it? He only spoke to me when I spoke directly to him, but always started up conversations with everyone else. It was annoying, and whenever I tried to ask him about it, he would just make up a reason for him to leave. I mean, since when has he ever chosen studying in the library over _me_? I know I sound conceited, but it's the truth. Something was wrong with him, and it was time someone fixed it. Whatever was bugging him, was ruining my plan to become a self-controlled person around him.

Sighing, I took a seat at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall for dinner with Becca and Alice. We all made up after the first day, Becca apologizing for what she said and me apologizing for acting like an ass. Usually, we would have sat with the Marauders, but none of us wanted to deal with the awkwardness between James and me.

"So, what's up with you and Potter these days, Lily? I thought you two were friends now," Alice asked innocently, while picking out the tomatoes in her salad.

My stomach leaped. "Uh, we are?"

"Doesn't seem like it; the only time you two talk is when you ask him how is day is, or if he's finished his homework," Becca said, eyeing me suspiciously. "And he's been looking pretty down these days. You didn't do something did you?"

A gust of air rushed out of my mouth as it popped open. "Of course not! I have no idea what's wrong with him. Actually, I was thinking of seeing him after dinner to ask what's wrong with him." I shrugged, satisfied with my answer, though I didn't know why I felt so defensive when I knew I hadn't done anything to make him this way.

"Mm," was the only answer I got from the both of them.

"What? You don't think I'm going to ask him, do you?" No comment. I gasped, realizing what the silence meant. "You don't think I even care!" I whispered accusingly, my eyes bulging as I leaned towards them.

They exchanged knowing looks, but it was only Alice who answered. "No, you care, we can tell. But I'm not so sure that's what _they_ think." I followed her gaze over to where the Marauders were eating, and my breath caught in my throat as I realized that the four Marauders were looking directly at me with scowls.

My shoulders slumped. "You guys, you can't be serious? Let me guess – they now think that I'm a cold hearted bitch, right?"

No comment.

"That's it – fine, after dinner, I swear, I will talk to him."

"Good for you, Lils. I'm glad to see that you're taking this friendship seriously," Becca joked, her eyes twinkling.

I just rolled my eyes, but inside, I was planning how I would confront James. Every time I tried to talk to him in the common, he went to library, so how was this time going to be different?

_Because you will actually try this time._

The words were true, but that didn't mean it would be easy. Actually, it was a lot harder than I'd thought it would be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

As I left the Great Hall alone, I tried to make out where James was. It was hard to find his head in the crowd, but I made myself keep looking. I even called his name once or twice hoping he would hear. But not once did I succeed in finding him.

Eventually, I found myself wandering the halls aimlessly, still no sign of James. I was beginning to wonder if he was avoiding me, or if we just weren't meant to be friends. _Or,_ I thought icily. _The prat never wanted to be friends in the first place._ I laughed at my idiocy. Of course! I gave him the chance to be friends, and he took it to mean something else. Then when I told him clearly that we could only be friends, he bailed on me. If he couldn't get what he wanted, he didn't want anything to do with it. Figures, the _one_ time I think I could change – that _he_ could change – he proves me wrong. But that was his loss; if he was so horny that couldn't even have friends that were girls, then he didn't deserve my company.

Proud and contented with my decision, I turned on my heel, and head back to the dorm just to run head first into someone else.

I didn't bother getting up; I just sat there, glaring ahead of me at the person I'd just bumped into – Severus Snape.

"You have eyes for a reason, Severus," I spat.

But he ignored the comment, and stared at me, his eyes glowing. "Lily! You're just the person I was looking for!"

"Oh, was I now? Well, too bad, Sev – I'm not interested in what you have to say!"

"No, please, listen! Last year, it was a mistake. I never should have said that word; I never should have called you that, and I-I-I'm-"

I cut him off with glare as I began to stand up. "Sorry? You're _sorry_? Do you honestly expect me to forgive you because you said _sorry?_" Clenching my hands into fists by my side, I walked over to him, bristling with anger. "Well, new flash, Snape, I will never forgive you! I thought we were friends, but, now that I think about, friends don't call friends _mudbloods_, especially to their faces. We've already had this talk, so just leave me alone, will you?!"

I turned to leave again, but his hand caught my wrist, and I yelped in pain. "Lily, listen – please try to understand! The word…it slipped out before I could stop it! I never wanted to call you that, but-"

"_But you did_," I hissed menacingly, looking him straight in his dark eyes. "And, last time I checked, you also called me that on the last day of school last year! _Don't worry – that mudblood means nothing to me anymore,_" I imitated, trying to tug my arm away. "I mean so little to you, Snape, then why are you trying to apologize to me every time you find me alone?"

His eyes narrowed, and I froze as he pulled out his wand. "You mean more than you think, Evans, so, before you can run away again, I'm going to explain myself _without_ interruptions. _Petrificus Totalus,_" he whispered, almost too quick for my ears to hear.

Coldness swept through my body like a wildfire, and I fell back, landing back on the stone floor with soft _thump_. My eyes wide with fear, I watched him walk to stand next to me, glaring at me with so much hatred that I've never seen in him when I was around him, as I felt warm sticky liquid spilling from my head, and I was certain that after he was through, I would either be severely hurt or…dead.

JAMES P.O.V.

"James!" I looked up from my Quidditch book that I was reading in the common room, and saw Rebecca and Alice running towards me, worry plastered on their faces.

"Yes?"

"H-have you…seen…Lily?" Rebecca gasped, leaning on the couch for support.

I tilted my head in confusion. "Yeah, at dinner, but, you know, from a distance…" I huffed angrily. Friends? Lily and me? Yeah, right – we were still acting hostile towards each other (well, some more than most.) It was like she had never talked to me that day after Transfiguration.

I snapped my attention back to them when they both groaned. "Why? What's wrong? Where is she?" I asked, more concerned now.

"She said she was going to talk to you today after dinner, but when she went looking for you, we kind of lost sight of her. We'd thought that she'd caught up with you, and you two were talking, but now we're not so sure. It's been almost an hour since we last saw her, and she's still not back. I-I think she might be wandering the halls for you," Alice explained hurriedly, her eyes wide.

The book in my hands dropped, and immediately, I was on my feet, running out of the common room with Alice and Rebecca on my heels. "What is she thinking? There's five minutes until curfew!" I muttered, pulling out a map from my pocket. "_I solemnly swear that I am up to no good_." The lines and dots appeared on the parchment, and I scanned it frantically, looking for a certain name.

My stomach lurched when I found her. She was in the dungeons, but she wasn't alone. Snape was with her.

"No," I breathed, still running. "Come on – we have to hurry. And keep your wands out," I added to the girls, and they did so without hesitation but did exchange worried glances with each other.

Keeping an eye on the map, tension building in my shoulders as I watched the two dots, who were still standing in the same places as before, I kept a steady but anxious pace. My heart missed a beat when I realized how close they were, and anger bubbled in my veins. I might not have any business loving Lily anymore, but I wasn't about to let some slimy git lay his hands her. Images of them together in the next ten years flashed through my mind, each on worse than the last and sending spasms of pain through my body. _He will _never_ get her,_ I promised myself angrily, just as we reached the corridor that was only populated by Lily and Snape.

I heard Alice and Rebecca gasp behind me. Lily was laying on the floor frozen, blood slowly pouring from her head, and Snape was standing over her, longing and horror in his eyes. His lips were moving, but we weren't close enough to hear. Furious (but also relieved seeing that they hadn't been the close position I'd been thinking of), I started towards him, getting angrier with each step. He still hadn't noticed our presence but it was only a matter of time.

Five feet away, I stopped, wand raised and slightly shaking. I was getting to blow him off his feet, to make him pay for what he had done to Lily, but then I heard what he was saying.

"I-I love you, L-Lily Evans," he whispered, starting to lean closer to her face. I was frozen in shock. He had gotten to say those three words before me. I shook my head, angry with myself – I didn't own Lily and she didn't want me, and she never would. I could still love her, of course, from a distance, but I had to accept the fact that we were only meant to be friends, nothing more. Soon I was going to have to find myself someone else – never love them the way I loved Lily, of course – and she was going to end up marrying someone in a few years, but that someone wasn't me. It wasn't ever going to be me. Lily didn't want me, and, no matter how hard I tried to make her see the real person in me, she never would actually know me. And I wasn't about to force her either.

But letting _Snivellus_ have her instead? No, that wasn't acceptable, and I wasn't about to let him kiss her without her permission, which I highly doubted he had seeing as she was petrified on the floor about to bleed to death. Glaring hatefully at the back of the git's greasy head, I held my wand more steady, planning my attack carefully. Each second was more painful than the last as I watched his lips get closer and closer to her soft lips that were losing color. Their faces were inches away now, and I was losing patience with myself, something I never had much of from the beginning. _Just do it!_ A voice from the back of my head hissed threateningly, urging me on. _Just throw the grease-ball against the wall! DO IT!_

_"STUPIFY!" _I yelled, and after a flash of red light, I saw Snape lying a feet away from Lily unconscious. "**Incarcerous," I added, to make sure he couldn't bother us when awoke. Running to Lily, I yelled to Rebecca and Alice, "Help me get her up to the Hospital Wing!" I picked her up carefully, making sure her head was carefully laid on top of my shoulder, and then turned around to face the other two girls, holding Lily in my two arms. Ignoring their worried faces, I pushed passed quickly and half-ran half-jogged all the way to the Hospital Wing, continually making sure her head was on my shoulder the whole time.**

**It was comforting to finally be able to hold like this, even in the condition she was in, and not getting smacked for it. Her skin was soft and, if she had not been losing so much blood, her would've been warm instead of getting colder and colder by the minute. She looked ghostly as she stared at me with her glazed over green eyes and her full lips partly open. It hurt me to see her this way, so vulnerable, but what hurt the most was that seeing her so weak only made me love her more.**

**I sighed, and quickly looked away from her, not glancing towards her face once the entire way up to the Hospital Wing. It was going to be hard to get over her, but whoever said getting over love was easy?**

A/N: Not as long as the others, but hope it's satisfactory! I promise the next chapter will be up soon – probably tonight or tomorrow! Thank you so much for commenting also! Let's try for more comments!


	4. Something More?

**A/N: **_**Finally**_** it's up! I can't believe how long it took to write this! Oh well – hope you enjoy it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything in the Harry Potter universe because, sadly, I am not as great as J.K. Rowling. All credit goes to her! (Except for Rebecca Bensons – I made her up!)**

_**Love Isn't Something You Get Over**_

_**By BubbleLove1234**_

_**Chapter 4 – Something More?**_

JAMES P.O.V.

I pushed through the doors to the Hospital Wing, careful not to hit Lily's head on the door. As soon as Madame Pomfrey heard my entrance she rushed out, and gaped at the sight.

"Dear heavens! What's happened?" she asked as she motioned for me to set Lily on one of the empty beds.

"I found her in the dungeons like this."

The woman's eyes widened as she tended to the wound on the back of Lily's head, muttering a few incantations. Silently, I stood back, watching as she hurried to stop the blood from spilling out and wincing each time I saw how pasty Lily was. There was no sign of color in her face, not even the rosiness of her lips was there. Her once flushed cheeks were completely white, and her fiery red hair was now almost entirely crimson from the spilled blood. But what pained me the most was her emerald eyes – what had once been shining with energy was now out, like someone had flicked the switch. They just stared into nothingness, frozen in the state they were in.

A small gasp from Madame Pomfrey brought me back to attention, taking my gaze away from Lily's face to rest on the woman's. "What? What is it?" I asked anxiously.

"I-It's her arm… T-the cuts…" was all she managed, and in two long strides was at the bed, staring at her arm.

She was right – there were cuts, hundreds of them, on her forearm, oozing sticky red liquid. A pool of the blood was staining the bed sheets below the damaged arm, and, in a matter of seconds, had tripled its size. This was where she losing so much blood.

"Well, by all means, fix this!" I practically screamed at the woman, staring in horror at the ashy arm. It was almost gray from the shortage of blood.

"Potter, I know that you are worried, but please, if you will, leave the wing? I need to work on this, and your hovering does not help," she said, as she began to try and close the wounds.

I nodded, still staring hopelessly at Lily's arm, but stepped back never the less. Taking one last wistful look at her, I turned on my heel and hurried out before I could stop myself from leaving.

I didn't go back to common room though, even if I knew Alice and Rebecca would be waiting to hear what happened. They would have to wait, just like I would have to wait to see if Lily survived the attack. Instead, I headed towards the owlery, not caring whether it was past curfew.

I sat in the tower the whole night, gazing up at the stars. Was she going to die? Was she going to live? How bad were her injuries? Questions just like these flew through my head, leaving unanswered but causing my tension levels to rise remarkably. If she didn't make it through this, I would be sure to make Snivellus pay for what he'd done. And if she did live, he would still pay – pay for hurting her, pay for nearly killing her, pay for almost taking her away from me.

I froze. No, he wouldn't pay for that last thing. Lily wasn't mine, nor will she ever, and I didn't have any right to make Snape pay for something he'd never done. Because she wasn't being taken away from me - she was being taken away from everyone. I just had to get used to it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Come on, James! Get up!"

Bright light shone through my closed eyelids, and I reached for a pillow – any pillow – to block it out. But the annoying nag in my ear wouldn't go away. No matter how many pillows I put to my ear, I would still be able to hear Sirius and Remus and Peter hovering over my bed trying to wake me up.

"Sorry 'bout this, mate," someone whispered, but I gave no thought to it.

Suddenly I was enveloped in freezing, ice cold water, and I jumped up, shivering, as I glared at the three boys standing around me. "What. The. Bloody. Hell. Was. That. _For?_" I said through gritted teeth.

My anger smoldering even more, they doubled over laughing. I waited patiently for them to regain control of themselves, still glaring at them. Once they recovered (after five minutes of uncontrollable laughter) they just grinned at me. "Sorry, man, but we had to get you up!" Sirius said, smiling to try and not laugh at the sight of my soaked body.

"And why did you have to do that?!"

But they just looked at me, as if there was something I was missing. But what could possibly be happening today? It wasn't the full moon, and we weren't planning any pranks for today – at least not big ones – so what could I be missing? My underwear? I looked down quickly, only to find everything where needed to be. I was completely covered up, so what were these goons talking about?

Then it hit me. My eyes widened, and a grin – the biggest grin I'd showed for about a week – appeared on my face. Today was the day Lily was supposed to wake up.

I brushed pass the three of them, and hurried to pull some clothes on then ran out before anyone could say a thing to me.

In no time at all, I reached the Hospital Wing and pushed through the doors. Alice and Rebecca were already there, standing around Lily's bed, as was Dorcas Willows (a Gryffindor in our grade.) I walked over to them, and, to my annoyance, found Dorcas blubbering and wiping tears from her eyes.

"I-I just c-c-can't b-believe that this…this…S-she di-didn't d-deserve any of i-it…" she sobbed, tears falling down her face like a waterfall. In my disgust, I slightly pushed her out of the way to get a better look at Lily.

Some of the color had come back, thankfully, and her lips weren't blue like the last few times I'd seen her but they weren't completely back to their original color. Yet, despite all this, I was still finding her beautiful. I smiled. Recently, I had made a deal with myself – I could think of Lily as beautiful, as the most exquisite thing in the world, but I couldn't ever think of her as the love of my life. It wouldn't be fair to her, and it wouldn't be fair to me to put myself through the pain of getting rejected, so this was middle-ground. It was my safe place where Lily-Land couldn't find me.

I turned away, still smiling, and faced Alice and Rebecca. "Has she woken up yet?" I asked a part of me scared of the answer.

She shook her head, a look of sadness clear on her face. "She was supposed to wake up an hour ago…" Alice murmured, staring at her sleeping friend.

My heart jumped into my mouth. Why hadn't she woken up in time? Had something gone wrong? But before I could really think about these questions, Madame Pomfrey squeezed herself in front of me, holding a potion. I watched her tip it into Lily's mouth then leave without a word.

Anger boiled in my veins, and I turned on my heel to leave, ignoring Alice and Rebecca's calls from behind me. There was some business that needed to be taken care of – I couldn't put it off any longer.

Throwing the doors to the Great Hall open, I stalked towards the Slytherin table. I scanned it carefully, looking for the slimy git, and when I found his greasy hair, and made my way towards him, my hand on my wand.

"You pathetic prat!" I roared, taking out my wand when I reached him. His eyes were full of fear and confusion. "You don't care about what you did to her! You were going to let her _die_!"

Comprehension shone on his face but the fear was still visible. "I-I thought I was t-t-too late!" he protested, and I saw his hand reaching for his pocket where the slight bulge of his wand was.

I glared, and before he could whip out his wand, I yelled, "EXPELLIARMUS!" I watched with satisfaction as he was blown backwards away from the table. Before he could get back up, I pointed my wand on him again, not fully understanding that the entire hall was watching us now. _Levicorpus_, I thought angrily, smiling when I saw him dangle in the air by his ankle and his robes fall down past his stomach, showing skinny pasty legs and white underwear. Everyone around us laughed, except for the Slytherins who were now throwing daggers at me. This was childish of me, and incredibly stupid to do right in front of the death eaters of tomorrow, but I wasn't going to let this git get away with what he'd done.

"JAMES POTTER!!!"

Professor McGonagalls screech still didn't stop me from levitating him in midair. Before she reached me however, I swung him side to side knowing this would be my last chance to make him pay.

"James Potter, let Severus down _at once_!" she yelled at me, disbelief at my actions. Reluctantly, I thought _Liberacorpus_, smiling a bit when I heard his head crack against the floor. No one rushed toward him to make sure he was alright, but from where I was standing, I knew there was no serious damage which slightly disappointed me. "_Detention_, Potter, for a week! Meet Mr. Filch in the trophy room tonight at seven. _Don't_ bring your wand!" And she turned on her heel, and made her way back to the staff table in angry strides.

As I left the Great Hall, feeling content with the results, I past the Gryffindor table and caught the eyes of Sirius, Remus, and Peter who all just stared back at me with uncertainty and pity. _Forget it, they don't understand…_ I thought sourly, pushing out the doors, leaving a silent and dumbstruck hall after me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Three more days past after my attack on Snape, and Lily, unfortunately still wasn't awake. Madame Pomfrey was beginning to worry, and was giving Lily potions and tending to her cuts every time I visited, which, in fact, were quite often. The only thing that kept me hoping for her miraculous awakening was the fact the each time I saw her, there was always a bit more color in her cheeks. No matter the small difference, it was always noticeable. Alice and Rebecca must have noticed it too because whenever they visited, I noticed their normally depressed faces that they had when around their friend lightened up to some extent.

Yet, it was like she was alive but dead. She had a pulse, but still looked like she was on the verge of dying, even with her returning color. She should have been awake three days ago, and she should be right here, right now, yelling at me for hexing a first year Slytherin. But she wasn't. Instead, I was sitting in the common room with Sirius, Remus, and Peter while they laughed at what we'd done (well, minus Remus, who was actually staring at the three of us with a disapproving scowl as he finished his Charms homework.)

"Um, James, don't you have detention in ten minutes?" he asked, while Sirius played out the attack on the first year by playing himself and using Peter as the Slytherin.

I shrugged, but got up anyway, leaving the common room without a word.

My mind was off in a far away land as I worked on cleaning the third floor bathrooms. I didn't even notice Filch come in to check up on me at midnight. And I'll give you one guess as to where my mind was.

Lily-Land.

I'd tried, and tried to avoid being caught by her minions, but somehow, each night during my detentions, they managed to capture my conscience and took me to the kingdom where I, no doubt, will spend the entire visit thinking about her and her brilliant green eyes and fiery red hair. My plans to get over her (not completely, of course, but enough so this is only a minor crush) weren't as foolproof as I'd thought, seeing as I'm the fool and the plan is definitely not working. If only she would just realize that we were meant to be together… That would make things so much easier for me.

"Alright, Potter." The wheezy voice of Filch caught me off guard, and I threw the mop I'd been using into the air in surprise. I winced when the mop landing mere inches from where the old man was standing, and silently punched myself for not paying attention to my surroundings. "Tryin' teh kill me, eh, Potter?" I shook my head frantically, opening my mouth to explain, but he cut me off. "Ten points from Gryffindor, but, seein' as you're ready teh leave, you can go back to your precious bed," he sneered. "Hopefully, these detentions do ya some good. Maybe next time you won't try to kill everyone in sight, yeah?"

I just ignored him, and made my way out of the bathroom, swearing I heard him mutter "Damn serial killer in the makin'" as I walked past him.

The halls were silent, only my footsteps to assure that I had not gone deaf, and suddenly I felt extremely lonely. The coldness of the corridors felt like I was carrying five hundred pounds of blankets on my chest and the darkness only made it worse. I needed to be near another human being, but the dorm was too far and Sirius and Remus and Peter were not the ones I needed at the moment. Right now, I needed a certain red head, and, whether it was against the friend code or not, that was Lily Evans.

LILY P.O.V.

_"No, please! Don't hurt him! Take me instead! Please!" I cried out at the dark hooded figure in front of me as it held up a white, bony hand pointing it's wand at me. My arms were spread wide in front of a crib, tears falling like a waterfall from my eyes._

_But the figure just laughed a hard, cruel laugh. "Silly girl, don't make this harder than it should be. Move and I might let you live!"_

_I shook my head helplessly. "No, no, no! Mercy, please, have mercy! He's just a baby! Don't kill him!"_

_Shivers ran down my back each time his laugh met my cries. He wasn't going to leave, I knew it, but I couldn't give up – I wouldn't give up on Harry. "Please, kill me! Kill me instead! Anything! Just don't hurt him!" I tried again, my head almost splitting from the painful sobs._

_"Move aside, you filthy mudblood, or I will kill you!"_

_"NO! Leave him be, just take me instead, I beg of you!"_

_"You are making a mistake. Dying for him will not save him, so move aside and you can live!" The figure was getting angrier, I could hear it in his voice, but I wasn't going to give up my son, my only son._

_I stared determinedly at the dark hooded figure, tears streaming down my face, as I kept my protective stance in front of the crib where the crying boy sat. His cries sent spasms of pain through me, making it almost impossible to stay standing, but they strengthened me too, giving me the courage to fight against the dark body. I had to do this for him, whether it was the last thing I ever lived to do – this was for them both._

_"You are an idiotic girl, but I admire your bravery… It's too bad you have such filthy blood, or I might have let you join me in return for your son, but no… You must pay for your actions…. AVADA KEDAVRA!!!"_

_Failure swept through my body as I felt the last breath of life leave my lips. I'd failed them… My attempts had been useless, and now my two meanings to live, to fight, had been taken away from me. I could only hope with all the might of my last breath that the dark hooded man would spare my son, even though I knew the possibility was hopeless. And the love of my life, the one I could trust with my soul, was gone, ripped away from the world in the cruelest way possible._

_I fell silently, my eyes glazing over, and I tried to fight the death that was sweeping through me. It was useless, and eventually, I gave in, taking one last glance at my sobbing son as I fell into an endless sleep._

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

My body flew forward instantly when my eyes fluttered open. Sweat was dripping from my forehead, and something wet and salty was hanging from my eyelashes and covered my entire face. I was panting heavily, my chest heaving in and out, as I clutched the one side of my bed with one hand and used the other to hold onto the something softer, but harder.

Wait - what about the other side of my bed?

I whipped my head around, swallowing quickly. It was hard to make out who it was in the darkness, but I could vaguely see the outline of disheveled, unkempt jet black hair and a pair of round glasses.

"P-P-Potter?" I whispered hoarsely, trying to calm my breathing down.

"Come on, lay back down – you're freezing and sound like you're about to cough up a lung," he said roughly, and I jumped when two strong hands pulled me back down gently. "Shh, it's alright, calm down. I'm here, it's alright," he repeated again and again softly into hair, as I pulled myself closer to his chest now crying from the after-shock of the nightmare. Fear shot through me when I remembered the cold-hearted laugh and bony fingers, and with it came the feeling of failure and disappointment towards me while I remembered falling after a flash of neon green light and the crying of the baby boy that had familiar dark hair.

I took deep, cleansing breaths when his hand started soothing circular motions on my sore back, and I was insanely grateful that I'd woken up with him here. I wouldn't have wanted anyone else to be here to comfort me.

And we laid there like that, him holding me and pushing my hair back whenever it fell into my face and me clutching his chest like my life depended on it, for ten minutes until we heard footsteps coming and he laid me back down into my original position, kissed my forehead, and left, disappearing just as quickly as a snap of my fingers.

I almost tried to stop him, but then the footsteps got louder and my attention was distracted with the fear of him getting caught. But when I regained my focus, he was gone and in the air that he had once stood was Madame Pomfrey, who was looking down at me with pure amazement and surprise on her face.

"Lily! Y-you're awake!" she gasped. "Good heavens, you're _alive!_"

I blinked, not quite understanding the situation.

"You do remember what happened, don't you?" she asked in hushed voice, suddenly concerned.

I closed my eyes, and immediately the memory came back to me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_"Such a pretty face," whispered the face of Severus, but I had my doubts, even in the position I was in. Severus never would do this to me….would he? Not once has he ever spoken to me like this or hurt me in any way on purpose, let alone the fact that we used to be the best of friends. So why was he acting so strange? "It's a shame I'll have to ruin it… Poor Potter and Snape will be so upset! Imagine their faces when they find their favorite red head dead in the dungeons." He smiled maliciously._

_My heart skipped a beat, as his words replayed themselves in my head. _Poor Potter and Snape will be so upset!_ But wasn't this Snape? Why was he talking in third-person? Something was wrong here, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it because of my disability as a petrified person and from the unconsciousness that was slowly beginning to envelope me._

_I watched, horrified but unable to show any emotion in my face, as he lifted his wand again and whispered something that I didn't catch. Pain rippled through me as I felt deep gashes cut themselves into my right arm. Tears burned in my eyes, begging for me to let them out, but I couldn't manage to blink. I could feel the cuts dig deeper and deeper and new cuts find themselves a place to dump out my now blood-covered arm. It burned, a pain I had never felt in my life, as the cuts got deeper. I could almost feel my heart pumping the blood out especially for the gashes, like that was now its only meaning – to drive as much blood as it possibly could out of my body before I died in the corridor._

_Memories of moments with my family and friends flashed before my eyes, and I could now believe what people meant by 'your life flashing before your eyes.' I saw my mom and dad and even Petunia before I'd received the letter from Hogwarts; I saw Alice and Becca sitting next to me on the train as we rode back to platform 9¾, laughing at something that the Marauders did; I saw the Marauders even while I chewed their heads off for setting dungbombs off in the girls' dorms; and last I saw James, smiling warmly at me the day I'd proposed we become friends. I memorized every direction his hair went, the way his hazel eyes moved me, and the way his bright smile seemed to lighten everyone's moods around him. My heart gave a not-so-gentle squeeze, and I felt more tears build up in my already tear-filled eyes. I was leaving so much behind, so much unsaid, so much not acted upon. Who knows what kind of life I could've had? Would I have had children, gotten married? Would I have lived to see the day the dark wizard, Voldemort, died? Would I have had a fulfilled life? Would it had been a happy life, one that had me surrounded by those I loved? So much unknown still, so much that never would happen…_

_Then suddenly, the pain stopped, and I was flying, almost oblivious to the world around me. I could still hear my attacker laughing at me, but the pain was gone. There was nothing left but complete numbness. _Is this how people die?_ I wondered, while I bathed in the peace and splendor. Was this heaven? Or, because of the somehow guilty bliss, was I in hell? Whatever, as long as I wasn't hurting, I was fine…_

_But then, what seemed like only minutes after I was thrown into a different state of mind. I was back standing in front of the crib with the crying baby and the cloaked figure laughing at my tears. Then, I woke up after my failure to save the baby once again, and found myself lying in James' arms._

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I nodded silently to the lady, and her previous smile was once again plastered to her face. "Well, I know that you've been asleep for so long already, but you really must drink this if you wish to get better." She tipped the potion she had been holding to my lips, and, wincing from the horrible taste, I swallowed quickly.

After recovering, I focused my attention on Madame Pomfrey. "H-How long w-was I-I…"

"Nearly two weeks, my dear."

My stomach did a somersault, and I could almost feel the potion trying to work its way back up my throat. _Nearly two weeks??_ But how come it felt like I'd only been out for minutes? Was that what comas felt like? I shook my head, not able to believe her words (but not fighting them either).

"Now, please try to rest, Miss Evans," she said again, still smiling at my great recovery. "You need it if you wish to be out before next Wednesday." And with that, she turned and left without another word leaving me with no choice but to follow her orders and to think over what had happened between James and me only moments ago.

Had our actions merely been friendly, or something horrifyingly more? What if he took my need to be comforted the wrong way? I was in no condition to be dealing with his flirting and obnoxious behavior. _But what do you call the way he just acted?_ A voice asked quietly in the back of my head. He _had_ in fact acted like he really cared, like he really did care for me. But what if it had all been his way of winning me over? What if he had only been thinking of using his caring actions as a way to get in my pants when I leave the Hospital Wing? What if he used my moment of vulnerability against me later, only to taunt me with?

_And what if he really does care, Lily?_ The voice asked. But to that, I had no answer or worrying questions to fight back with.

**A/N: So? You like? I tried my best to make it longer than the others and to get more information in. Hopefully, now you have an idea of what's going on and how exactly James and Lily feel about their relationship as "**_**just friends**_**."**

**I'll try to get the next chapter up tomorrow, but if not, you can look forward to reading Chapter 5 on Saturday! Anyways, many thanks to all my readers and remember to R&R so I know how I did with this chapter!**


	5. Grow Up

**A/N: This took so long, and I'm so sorry it took forever to get up! So, in favor of your patience, I'm giving you a longer entry! I hope you like it, and please remember to reply after reading!**

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_**Love Isn't Something You Get Over**_

_**By BubbleLove1234**_

_**Chapter 5 – Grow Up**_

LILY P.O.V.

_This was horrible._

_This was the worst._

_This was just plain boring._

Why couldn't she just let me out of this death hole? It smells like sick people and apples in here! I mean, really, I'm awake, doing my homework, talking like a normal human being, and I wasn't passing out each time I got up to walk around a bit. So why the hell won't she let me out?!

I've tried, nearly a hundred times, to get bailed out of here or convince her to let me out, but does it work? No, of course not! Not for me because this is _me_, Lily Evans, trying to do something for myself. What? Am I just doomed to always be last on my list to make happy? Is everyone else really that important that I simply cannot be granted my needs and wants until the world has had their share. So this obviously explains my grouchiness, but, truthfully, it wasn't the one and only reason. There was another but I tended to not stray into its traps in my mind.

But, if you must know, the other problem was a certain big-headed git that had somehow managed to make me question everything about me. He'd managed to make me question everything about my life, everything that makes me hate everything James Potter. And, somehow, I'd managed to let him lure me in, being the airhead I am. I wasn't supposed to be doing this! Right now, if he hadn't ever been there with me that night three days ago, I wouldn't even be thinking about him. And if I was, I wouldn't be thinking about good he smells when I snuggle close to his chest, or how comforting his strong arms (that I suspect come from playing years of Quidditch), or how soothing his heart beat is when I put my ear against him. No, I wouldn't be bothering to think about _any_ of these if he hadn't somehow found a weak spot in my hard exterior shell.

Ugh, but was I thinking? There was no reason to let him get to me like that, none at all. Yes, his arms may be amazingly muscular and soft, but did that mean I had to become just another fan girl of Potter's? That's right – _no._ And just because he has the most gentle, unique, beautiful eyes that always seem to understand what you're feeling or look right into your eyes and see your soul…

Hey, hey! Stop right there, missy! No need to go drool over the prat. Remember – he's practically the reason you're in this place. He'd just been too full of himself to even bear letting everyone know he couldn't even get to first base with me. Ha! Like he even has a chance of getting that close to me…

Oh no, scratch that – maybe Potter isn't really the only one who's occupying my mind.

I'd completely forgotten about the reason I was here! But, now that I really think about it, it really is taking up a huge amount of my thinking. And most of it was questions, unfortunately.

Why did Severus attack me? And why did he refer to himself in third person? And, what worried me most, was why did he hurt me? I'd never known Severus to be that foul, at least not around me, and I hated the thought that he might actually have gone over to the dark side. Was this my fault? If I had just stayed friends with him, forgiven him for all his wrong doings, would he be different now? Would he have given up the Dark Arts and decided to fight against them instead? With a sinking feeling, I realized that maybe I had truly been his reason for going bad. I almost began crying my eyes out at the thought, but caught myself just in time and realized that I wasn't the only one in the ward.

Since I'd woken up, three students have been brought in, mostly from hexes or Quidditch practice injuries. I had the slightest inkling as to who might be the perpetrator of the hexes, but I was struck dumb when Marlene McKinnon and Derek Wood, the beaters for Gryffindor team, stumbled in with Sirius Black and Becca holding them up over half an hour ago. McKinnon's arm looked limp like there were no bones left and had what looked like dry, crusty blood where a deep gash stood out remarkably; Wood had sported a broken nose and cut on his chest, where his shirt would have been but was instead bare, revealing toned abs and a very tan, but bloody, chest. Not that it matters to me, of course, good looks aren't everything, but that didn't stop me from blushing furiously when he came in, leaning into Sirius' side, half-unconscious. It looked like he'd flown into something, when I realized the red bump on his forehead that was starting to darken into purple. And McKinnon must have done the same. What had happened out there?

"Oh my dear god!" cried Madame Pomfrey (the most hated woman in my book) as she ran towards them frantically. "What's happened?"

As Sirius and Becca laid the two injured athletes on beds, they explained simultaneously what had happened.

"The team was practicing," Becca began, her face pale and slightly green while she tried to not look at the blood.

"When the bludgers began acting up," Sirius finished.

"Each time one of the beaters hit one, it would double back and chase them instead."

"Then, after McKinnon hits one, it come back and slams right in her arm, and she falls off her broom from twenty feet in the air."

"Everyone tries to catch her, but Wood is closer and he fortunately catches her in time just before she hits the ground. No one's paying attention to the bludgers, so I guess, that's why it took us by surprise when it came out of nowhere and hit him in the face."

"And Miss Space Cadet here thinks she can help McKinnon with her arm, but ends up taking every bone from her arm except for the one that's in her lower arm… Can't quite remember what you call it…"

"I swear, I was only trying to make it easier for Madame Pomfrey!" Becca protested, shooting an exasperated glare Sirius' way. "At least I didn't try to cut his heart out!"

Sirius reddened, but kept his stand. "It was an accident! And you were making me nervous by yelling directions at me!" He turned to the bewildered Madame Pomfrey with his infamous charming smile that has, to my great surprise, managed to catch the eyes and hearts of nearly every female in this school. "Pommy, please forgive me – I was merely trying to be as good as you are at healing."

I huff in disbelief, rolling my eyes at his words, and knowing that "Pommy" would without a doubt chew him out. But my mouth hangs open when I realize she's smiling shyly at Sirius. You have _got_ to be kidding me…

"Sirius, you flatter me, but next time please leave the healing up to me," she says sweetly, then turns to gaping Becca with a look of distaste. "And remind your little friend that too." Sirius smirks at Becca's enraged expression, and even I can't help but stifle laughter at my friends face. "Now, off you go – I assure you that your team mates will be fine!"

And with that, the two athletes (Becca shooting murderous glares at the back of Sirius' head) exit the wing, and once again I find myself bored out of my mind and slightly disappointed. For one, I'd expected at least more of a fight from Becca to entertain me for at least a while. Usually, she makes sure he pays for whatever he did, even in front of a staff member. Surely she couldn't possibly be softening up around Sirius? We still had so many pranks to play on him (most involving meddling with his hair products), and if she was beginning to soften up, then we needed to have a talk!

And, secondly, I hadn't received so much as a glance in my direction the entire time they were here. What was up with that? I know they'd just brought in two injured players, but that shouldn't stop them (especially not Becca) from sending a smile my way or a simply _wave_. Were they suddenly too good for me that they couldn't be bothered with patients? I laughed to myself, but didn't press the issue further. No need to get worked up about something so small.

So, I contented myself with spending my day watching Madame Pomfrey treating her newly arrived patients (including Hannah Bagpluff, a second year in Slytherin that had been hexed in the halls while she was going to class) and working on the homework that Becca and Alice bring to me daily.

At nearly ten o'clock at night, I decided to hit the sack. Moving the pile of papers to my bedside table, I pulled the curtains closed around my bed and shut my eyes.

Only a minute later though, I feel the need to move around, so I pull the curtains open again and slip noiselessly out of the ward, careful not to trip over my toes or a crack in the floor.

This was exactly what I needed – a walk around the castle. It was crazy that I hadn't been let out yet of the wing yet, seeing as most of my injuries were almost gone and were mostly scabs and scars. Madame Pomfrey was just a bit overly-protective about her patients, I guess.

I sighed and continued my walk, stopping to gaze at the stars and full moon every so often when I came across a window. They were beautiful and cleared my head so easily that I wondered if maybe they'd been charmed to do so. I shook my head, knowing that some magic doesn't have to be forced – sometimes it's just always going to be there.

Realizing I must have been out for at least an hour now, I turned to go back to the ward when a spine tingling, horrifying howl reached my ears, and I froze in my spot. My breathing came out in short, ragged breaths, and I tried to find some feeling in my feet (something that had suddenly disappeared when I heard the howl) so I could move somewhere, anywhere.

Finally, when my toes tingled in fear, I whipped around and ran back to the window. The grounds were dark, but the moon shined bright light down like a gigantic flashlight had been lit. Silently thanking the unknown magic of the full moon, I scanned the grounds and the outline of the Forbidden Forest.

Rigid with fear, I moved my fingers rhythmically along the cold stone windows, and stared bug-eyed at what appeared to be nothing. I'd lost concentration, and nearly fell asleep on the spot. Nothing came, and I didn't hear any more noises. Had I just imagined it all? I huffed, and rolled my eyes. The overwhelming injuries and sick people were starting to get to my head. Taking one last wistful look at the grounds, I turned away reluctantly, and made my way back to the Hospital Wing.

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Bright light seared my closed eye lids. Groaning, I grabbed the nearest pillow and threw it over my head, in hopes to block out the annoying light. This was not how I wanted to wake up. In fact, I never wanted to wake up this way for the rest of my life. Note to self: Always close curtains around bed, and put up new ones at home when you leave school.

"Not a morning person, eh?"

I screamed and fell off the bed in surprise. Quiet sniggering close by sent a rush of blood to my face, and I looked around nervously for the owner of the voice. That didn't take long – the only other human awake in the room was Derek Wood.

"Shut up," I muttered, trying to get back up onto the bed, but before I could move a muscle, two strong hands lifted me back up. I turned around in surprise to find Derek standing behind me with a warm smile. "Thanks," I whispered.

"No problem." He walked back to his bed that was now next to mine.

Eyeing his crooked nose, I giggled and smiled apologetically. "Sorry about your nose."

"No big deal – just another freak accident," he scoffed, still smiling at me. "At least gives me a great story to tell the ladies."

I laughed, rolling my eyes and knowing that he was too sweet to ever use his nose to get girls. "'Oh, yeah, last night I totally beat up the bunny in the dungeons last night, and all I was left with was a broken nose and a huge cut across my chest,'" I said, trying to match his low voice.

"Hey! That bunny was vicious! It seriously could have killed me!" he protested, with a serious face that looked like it was on verge of breaking into another huge smile. He just couldn't keep the smile off his face, could he?

I threw my pillow at him playfully. "You're right – next time I see a bunny, I'll make sure to run and hide before it uses its super-strength on me."

"Oh, really?" he said, raising an eyebrow while lifting two pillows, and for a second I was almost scared. Then a smile spread across his face, and I relaxed.

"Ha, I thought you were going to attack me with-"

But I was cut off with a mouthful of pillows. I laughed and kicked trying to push him back, but I only met empty air.

"Derek! Get these off of me right now!" I squealed, still kicking the air.

"Oh, look at this comfy bed!" I heard him say, and almost screamed. He wouldn't _dare._ But just as soon as I thought it, I felt a large body sit on top of my pillow covered legs.

"Ah! Get off!" My voice was muffled while I tried to move the pillows out of my face so I could get a better view of the situation. The sudden light blinded me for a few seconds, but when I adjusted, I saw him staring at me triumphantly while he sat on me. He bounced up and down softly on my legs a few times just to prove who'd won this pillow war.

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He was handsome, and his eyes were so mysterious – dark brown with a really dark blue ring surrounding the darkness. His toned arms were also mesmerizing. You could see the muscles pushing the tanned skin slightly. I almost reached out to see if they were real, but caught my hand just in time.

"Come on, Wood, time to get off," I said, trying to take my legs out from under him. He smiled (when was he ever _not?_) and did as he was told, but continued staring at me. Uncomfortable silence past between us as he watched me fix my hair and bed. Then, finally, he opened his mouth to speak.

"Listen, Lily, there's a Hogsmead trip next weekend, and, well, I sort of wondering if maybe you'd like to join me for lunch at the Three Broom Sticks there?" he asked nervously, suddenly interested in the stone floor.

My cheeks heated up, and now I was the one staring (except I was staring more in surprise.) He wanted to take _me_ to Hogsmead? Really? Was this a joke, did he really want to take me? "Um, sure, okay," I managed when I realized he was waiting for my answer.

His grin widened (if that was possible), and his head snapped up towards me. "Great! Well, should we meet there, or do you want to walk together?"

"How about I just meet you there at about noon?"

"Perfect, so…I guess I'll be seeing you there at noon," he said, still smiling like he'd just won the lottery.

I nodded, unable to speak. Derek Wood just asked me out! _The_ Derek Wood! I feel like I'm going to pass out now!

"Ah, Miss Evans!" Madame Pomfrey's voice echoed, reaching our ears, and I tore myself away from his face to see her walking towards us. "I see that you're doing well."

"Well, I have been in here for almost two weeks," I muttered so only Derek could hear. He snickered, but either Madame Pomfrey didn't notice or pretended not to.

"I've decided that it's time you are let out. So, please, unless you don't feel well enough to go to classes yet, leave when you have all of your belongings gathered up."

Could this day get any better?! I grinned, ear to ear, and jumped up in my excitement to finally be able to leave this rat hole. "Oh, no worries, Madame Pomfrey! I'll be out in no time _at all_!" She nodded, and left the ward briskly. Turning to Derek, I gave him another apologetic smile. "I bet you'll be out of here soon enough."

He laughed. "'Course I will. I only have a broken nose."

I smiled, and, after collecting my books and homework, left the Hospital Wing, feeling weightless and a little spring in my step as I made my way to the common room.

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That night while I sat in the common room with Becca and Alice, I went over what happened with Derek at least ten times to meet their wishes. They decoded every move he made and everything he said. This went on until about eleven, then they decided that they needed to get to bed, suggesting as they drowsily made their way up the stairs to the girls' dorm that I get to bed soon too.

"That's alright, I'm not really that tired," I insisted with a smile, waving them off. They certainly didn't put up much of a fight.

Sighing, I fell back onto the couch, letting every tension in my body leave. Who knew that guys could cause so much tension to talk about? I mean, really, wasn't it obvious already that when he asked me to accompany him to Hogsmead, he meant he wanted me to accompany him to Hogsmead? This wasn't rocket science!

"Tough day?"

I jumped out of my reverie in surprise by the sudden voice, and my head snapped up to find James Potter taking a seat at the end of the couch. If he hadn't surprised me, and force me to look at him, I would never have noticed how tired he looked. Dark circles were noticeable, and his hazel eyes could barely stay open when he laid his head back on the couch.

"Talking to me again?" I muttered, scrambling to the farthest corner of the couch. He really had some nerve to just start talking to me like he hasn't been ignoring me since before the incident in the dungeons or what happened when I woke from my coma.

A smile tickled at his lips, but it never reached his eyes. "Am I?"

I glared. "What do you want?"

He shrugged, and sat up to look at me fully. He really did look tired, and I almost was worried for him. Surely someone shouldn't be so tired, especially Potter who is always complaining about his 'beauty sleep.' "So, I heard you…made plans with Wood." I could see the smile he was trying to muster up, but never did it come. It looked more like a pained grimace.

I narrowed my eyes, wondering where this could possibly be going. "Does it matter?"

"No, I was just confirming it."

"Mm, hmm…" I trailed off, still suspicious of his dark circles and inquiry about my love life. Then, without thinking, I blurted, "Are you feeling okay?"

He smiled, but it wasn't the smile I was looking for. It was like a smirk. "Does it matter?" he said, copying my previous words.

I scowled. "I was just wondering," I snapped, looking away from his eyes and to the crackling fire. "You just looked a little sick, that's all…."

"Are my ears deceiving me, or did I really just hear Lily Evans admit that she was worried about my well-being?" he joked, and I realized that he was now somehow closer than just a minute ago. I squirmed, and pressed closer to the arm of the couch, focusing my eyes on the fire.

"You could go and jump from the owlery for all I care," I muttered, scowling at the fire and my mess-up. Leave it to Potter to be given an inch, and take a mile.

"Aw, what happened to our friendship? I thought we agreed to be civil?"

Oh, he's done it now. I jumped up, spinning with such strength that when I met his gaze, he almost looked scared. "_Friendship?_" I hissed, not believing my ears. "You think we have some kind of _friendship?_ Is that what you call it now? When you completely ignore me, and make me look like a bitch?" He backed away a little, his smirk completely wiped off his face. "Damn it, Potter, friends don't ignore each other! They actually talk, and they most certainly don't avoid the friend because she doesn't want to go out with you!"

Fury flashed in his eyes, and he stood up, practically knocking me backwards in his sudden movement. "You are so _full_ of yourself!" he yelled in my face, but I kept my ground, still glaring. "You take everything so seriously! How do you even know what the note was about, huh? How do you know that you didn't just misunderstand?"

"_Misunderstand?_" I scoffed, crossing my arms in front of me, finally backing away. "Did I really misunderstand?"

For that, he had no answer, but just looked away sheepishly, and I growled. "You are unbelievable, Potter. I give you a chance to be more than just enemies, and you think I'm going to sleep with you… God, I am such an _idiot_!" I muttered to myself. "You know what? Don't speak to me ever again until you can learn how to grow up, otherwise, you're just wasting your time." And with that, I spun on my heel, and ran up the stairs to the girls' dormitory, my eyes burning with unshed tears.

_No,_ I told myself, as I climbed into bed. _I will not cry over someone as worthless as Potter. I will never cry over him, he's just a childish, arrogant git. He's not worth your tears, Lily._

But in less than ten minutes, I was drifting off, my face pressed against a damp pillow.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

JAMES P.O.V.

Walking to class the next morning with Sirius must have been the hardest thing I've had to do in my entire life. We took every short cut we could think of so I wouldn't run into Lily, and even when we did see her, I hid my face carefully and walked behind Sirius. This strategy worked for every class I walked to – that is until Sirius finally snapped.

"Man, get a hold of yourself!" he practically screamed in my face while we walked to the Great Hall. "Don't let her get to you! Jesus, I think he's finally lost it, Moony."

Remus studied my face carefully, before turning to Sirius. "I think you're right, Sirius."

"Of course I am, why wouldn't I be? Still, I think this calls for drastic measures."

Remus raised a brow, and I groaned knowing exactly what Sirius was implying. He would use anything for an excuse to-

"Throw a house party!" Sirius cried, throwing his arms up. When no one erupted into applause, he frowned. "No, now listen, Moonster-"

"Moonster?" Remus questioned quietly, but Sirius waved it off.

"Listen, now if we get him partying, and a bit drunk, there's no doubt that he'll get over her easier! And, who knows, maybe he'll even get the second base with Suzie?" He nudged me, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. I rolled my eyes, remembering my Ravenclaw girlfriend. We've been going out since school started, but really, this had all just been a secret plan of mine to get on Lily's nerves and, much to my pleasure, meet my physical needs. Truthfully, I think the girl's an annoying slut, but according to my sources (a.k.a. Remus, Sirius, and Peter), every time Lily saw me with the seventh year, she usually ended up breaking whatever she was holding. Laughing to myself, I shook my head.

"I think I'm going to break up with her," I announced, and, just as I had suspected, Sirius' mouth dropped and Remus' eyes bulged.

"Are you crazy? She's the hottest girl in the school, and you're just going to dump her?" Sirius asked, like I'd just told him his favorite hair product wasn't on the market any more.

I nodded, and brushed past them to enter the hall. I didn't want to talk about this right now. But did that stop them from pressing the issue? No, my friend, it did not.

"Well, at least wait until after the party! If you just wait, you might be able to…have a little fun with her, if you know what I mean," Sirius said, like I didn't understand what I understand what he was implying.

"Fine, whatever, but I'm breaking up with her after that," I said, taking a seat at our regular spots. My eyes scanned the table for a certain red head, but I caught myself just in time. If she caught me looking now, just after we fought, she would certainly blow.

Yet, it seems my friends really don't want me to be happy right now.

"Oi, looks like Evans and Wood are certainly getting close," Sirius muttered, filling his plate with enough food to feed an entire family of five.

My head snapped up, and I realized he was right. There, just far enough away for me to see them clearly, were Lily and Derek, sitting across from each other, holding hands across the table while Derek wiped something from her face. Fury bubbled in my veins, and it took every ounce of my will-power (and a few restraining hands from Remus and Sirius) to not walk right over to my team mate and punch him in the face.

Was she trying to kill me? Or was she secretly telling me to get the prat off her by sitting so near to me? Maybe she really only wanted me to see this so I could save her….

"Listen, Prongs, there are better ways to get back at them, but right now just ignore them," Remus insisted while he held me back. Sirius nodded in agreement, his eyes glancing back and forth between the two lovebirds and me.

"Fine," I muttered, my muscles relaxing. "But if he so much as travels south, I swear I will-"

"Hey, Jamsie!" interrupted a squeal, and my tall Ravenclaw girl plopped herself down between Remus and me. I inhaled sharply, closing my eyes, but recovered just in time to kiss Suzie back when she pressed her lips to mine. The usual shock and my mind running off with the kiss didn't come this time, and I found myself instead keeping control of the kiss and pulling away when she started to get carried away.

"Hey, Suzie," I said, returning to my food, and keeping an eye on Lily who, I realized, was now watching us with a look of disgust. I almost choked on my fork in surprise, but smiled when her face paled remarkably when I gave Suzie another quick snog. Hey, I'm just experimenting how much control I actually have over this situation. Hmm…I wonder…

Leaning towards Suzie's ear, I whispered with a seductive grin, "I found a new broom closet earlier, maybe I could meet you there after dinner?"

I watched with satisfaction as Lily glared, but her reaction was nothing as I'd hoped it would be. In fact, I never heard Suzie's reply because I was so surprised and angry.

Lily leaned across the table, her shirt dropping a bit, and Derek definitely wasn't paying attention to her face. His eyes darted down south, and I gripped my seat tightly to stop myself from throwing him out the window. He nodded to whatever she said, and she pecked him softly on the lips.

"Whoa, Prongs!" Sirius cried, just as I fell out of my chair.

Dizzy and infuriated, I waved away Remus' and Sirius' helping hands. "Um, I'll just meet you in common room later…" I muttered, walking briskly out of the hall ignoring the stares and Lily's curious gaze.

That woman was going to be the death of me for sure… She nearly knocked me out cold only seconds ago! I really needed to learn how to control myself. If this continues, next thing you know, you'll be standing at my funeral. Now that wouldn't be pleasant… Hmm, I wonder if Evans would go to my funeral…

I shook my head, and continued down the corridors, making a beeline for the common room. I murmured the password, and practically tore the painting open when she didn't let me in.

"What are you talking about? Just an hour ago the password was Hippogriff!" I protested.

"Your Head Girl, Miss Megan Abbot, is very serious about her job, and you should be glad she takes the safety of her fellow classmates so earnestly. Now, if you will excuse me, I need to return to my nap," huffed the Fat Lady, getting into a comfortable position.

"No! You have to let me in! I have no idea what the password is!" I cried, kicking the wall angrily. This was not my best day ever.

But she didn't answer, and soon I heard quiet snores coming from the painting. Closing my eyes, I took three deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. Long story short, it didn't work. And it didn't help that the only thing I could think about was Lily leaning over the table, practically letting her chest out of her shirt for dumb Wood, and kissing right then and there in front the entire school. Now it was official – they were really together, _together_. Just when I'd thought I was getting somewhere, she finds a reason to run away again. _Figures…_ I think to myself darkly, rolling my eyes as I took a seat next to the portrait waiting for someone to come soon. _And this time, I didn't force anything…_

Was she just always going to run from me? Did I even have chance with this beautiful disaster? Or have I just been fighting fate all these years? I could see myself doing that, but I could also see Evans fighting us. So which was it? Am I being the idiot, or is she too scared of what could happen between us? Did she have commitment issues? _No, she couldn't,_ I thought. _She's with Wood, isn't she? Don't people with commitment fears avoid being in relationships?_ I've seen enough of Sirius' bad attitude towards girlfriends to know that this was true, so she couldn't possibly fear commitments. If she did, she never would have accepted Wood's invitation to Hogsmead.

But if we really were meant to be together, then why was she with Wood? I know that he would never try and hurt her (I've seen the bloke in action, and not once has he ever cheated on his girlfriends – it was always the other way around.) And Lily would be with him as long as possible (again, I've seen the girl in action – every guy she's been with (which was never long thanks to _moi_) has always been the one that broke it off between them.)

Of course! It was like a light bulb had just gone off above my head. They would never do anything to hurt each other purposefully, but, if executed correctly, maybe there was a way to _make_ someone hurt the other…

A devious smile slowly grew on my face as the plan unfurled in my head. This was going to be perfect – there was no way this could go wrong – and soon Evans would be running into my arms, with me there to comfort her. Yep, this was brilliant, and, if I ever told Sirius (which I wouldn't because the man has a huge mouth) I know he would be proud.

* * *

**A/N: I know that James barely ever has much to read, but this was where I had to end it! This story just writes it self, you know? And if I added any more, it all would have been useless, so, trust me, it's better this way. But, I promise that the next chapter you will have a better look into James' mind.**

**Next chapter is the Hogsmead weekend! This, I hope, will be interesting for you to read! And there will be a little bit of Lily/James action, but not much.**

**R&R please!**


	6. I'm A Downright Git

**A/N: Hey, here it is! Remeber to comment after reading! And ****_please_ give me any criticism you have! I really am hoping to improve my writing, so I would appreciate it greatly!**

**Disclaimer – I don't it.**

_**Love Isn't Something You Get Over**_

_**By BubbleLove1234**_

_**Chapter 6 – I'm A Downright Git**_

LILY P.O.V.

"Lily! Come on! You have to wake up!"

My bed bounced up and down rapidly, and I groaned, throwing my fluffy pillow in a random direction. I heard a thump, and smiled to myself – I'd hit my target, and, guessing by the muffled grunt, my victim had fallen to the floor.

"Jesus, Lily, you are _so_ not a morning person!" I recognized Becca's voice, and giggled silently. Everyone knew that Rebecca Bensons was the one person you should never wake from her slumber, unless, of course, you had a death wish. Last year, Sirius had snuck up here to wake her up in the middle of night on a dare. Thinking that the rumors were all bogus, he dumped a cup of ice cold water on her face. Let's just say he will never mess with my friend _ever_ again unless he wishes to keep his face boil and zit free.

So this is what got me wondering – what could possibly be so important that she actually woke up before me? Sneaking a glance at my alarm clock, I read the time.

I jumped up, my face red, and glared down at the girl on the floor by my bed. "BECCA, WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!" I shouted, clenching my fists to stop myself from chasing her out of the dormitory and out into the freezing grounds. "YOU WOKE ME UP AT SIX IN THE MORNING??"

Pure shock was etched across her face, and she looked frightened. Her mouth kept opening and closing, never emitting a sound. Finally, she just pointed a shaky finger towards my calendar.

I followed, not understanding what this was about. Every day was crossed out except for today, which was bordered by a fat red circle and smiley faces and hearts. I stared at the date, October fourteenth, still confused. The day sounded familiar, important, but I couldn't quite my finger on it… Oh.

"Oh my god, Becca, I'm so sorry!" I squealed, quickly bending down to help her up. She let out a relieved sigh, and soon her cheerful smile was turned back on. "I completely forgot it was today! Oh, jeez, I'm so sorry for yelling at you!"

"No biggie, I would have done the same," she laughed, winking. "Now, we only have six hours to make you a smokin' hot veela, so let's get to it!" Before I could protest, she had already grabbed my arm, and was dragging me towards the bathroom. The rest of the girls in our dorm were sleeping soundly, apparently never hearing my quick outburst. No surprise there – my year was full of lazy sixteen year olds that loved to get their beauty sleep. Lucky them, they weren't going on their first date today, unlike _moi_.

After I took a quick shower, Becca began working on my makeup and hair, snapping at any girl who walked in on my make over session. Everyone just growled sleepily, but didn't protest. I suspected they went to the fifth year dorms to use their bathrooms instead.

"Your toast, O' Great One," Alice giggled, setting a plate of golden brown toast in front of Becca after being sent down by Becca to fetch us some food so we didn't go hungry. "And your yogurt, beautiful."

I rolled my eyes, and began spooning strawberry yogurt into my mouth while Becca curled my hair into the loose waves. I had no idea what I looked like, but I was hoping Becca wasn't going overboard with her new, temporary doll.

"Wow, Lils, you look amazing! Derek is going to be head over heels for you!" Alice gaped, hands on her hips while she took in my transformation.

I blushed and didn't say anything. I highly doubted I looked _that_ good. "So, are you two going with anyone?" I asked nonchalantly, changing the subject quickly.

A smile spread across Alice's face. This was just what I'd been hoping for. "Actually, I am," she said, blushing slightly.

Gripping this opportunity to take the spotlight off me, I begged her to continue. "Who? Why hasn't anyone told me this?"

"_I _didn't know this, Lils. Just calm down, and stop moving or you'll ruin your hair!" Becca snapped.

I ignored her but did as I was told, still waiting for Alice to spill the beans.

"F-Fred Bugbutton," she said.

"Er." Had I heard her right? Fred BugButton? Was there even a Bugbutton here? "Fred…Bugbutton?" I asked uncertainly.

My curiosity grew even more when she clutched her sides, doubled over laughing. I waited patiently for her to regain her posture. Wiping a tear from her eye, she opened her mouth the talk.

"No, no! I said…" But I never heard the rest because she burst out laughing again. I exchanged a worried glance with Becca who also had no idea who the girl was going with.

"Really, Alice, who is it then?" I said, itching to know who she could possibly be going with.

She took a deep breath, and, crossing her arms, she started talking again. "Ok, ok, I'm going with…Frank Longbottom."

Becca squealed, and I screamed. They looked at me inquiringly, and I tried to hit Becca's hand while tears formed behind my eyes.

"Damn it, Becca, get that thing off of my head before it burns a hole right through my head!" I yelled, trying to hit the curler away from my head.

Her eyes widened, and she took it out of my hair. Relief instantly passed through me and I rubbed my head sourly, sending a dark look her way. "I'm really happy for you, Alice. It's about time you two confessed your feelings," I mumbled.

She rolled her eyes, but they both still looked at me worried. "I'm fine, really," I insisted, taking my hand away from the burn. "You can continue, Becca." I smiled half-heartedly at her, a bit nervous to let her near my hair again with the curler. But I had to – I only had half an hour until I had to be in the Three Broom Sticks. Then, everything would be perfect. I would have a boyfriend, and the perfect first date.

By tonight, there was no doubt I would be the happiest girl in the school.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Taking a deep breath, I hurried down the staircase to the common room. I was nervous, and while I walked through the common room to the door, the cat calls I was getting didn't help. I had to watch my step so as to not fall face first into the carpet. Why had I let Becca dress me up? I should have known that she would take advantage of the situation.

I was wearing a short denim skirt (the shortest I've ever worn) and a tight emerald top that Alice said brought out my eyes with a dark jacket and black strappy heels. What was wrong with me? How was I going to get _anywhere_ in this outfit? I would most likely get raped before I could make it all the way to Hogsmead. I really needed to have a talk with Becca about her sense of style when I get back from this date…

I walked down the quiet corridors (most students were either in their common rooms or at Hogsmead), my heels clicking against the stone. I almost tore them off and threw them in a broom closet I was that annoyed. But maybe I could just take them off real quick so I can get outside faster…?

The idea appealed greatly to me, and I was just about to go along with it when I heard someone up ahead.

I peaked around the corner, afraid of whom I would find. If it was a Slytherin, I was doomed. This outfit, unfortunately, was definitely _not_ made for fighting off bloodthirsty death eaters. So, yes, this was why I almost burst out laughing at who I found. Rolling my eyes at my previous worries, I stepped out from behind the corner and continued on my way to Hogsmead.

"Evans!"

I turned back, smiling. There stood James Potter, struck dumb at my unexpected appearance in the hall. "Yes?"

He fidgeted uncomfortably in front of me, throwing glances behind his shoulder and trying without success to not stare at my chest. "Um, er, nothing. Just didn't expect to see you here, that's all. Well…later," he muttered, hurrying away from me.

_Okay then?_ I shook my head, and hurried to Hogsmead. I had ten minutes until I was supposed to be at the Three Broomsticks.

I broke into a run (or at least tried to – it was more of limp, or something of the sort) when the cold air of outside whipped my face, and once again I found myself cursing Becca for putting me in this god damned outfit.

Gasping and weak in the knees, I was finally standing in front of the Three Broomsticks with two minutes left. In case you were wondering, I am Wonder Woman.

Ten minutes past, and I was shivering in the cold staring wistfully after the tons of people who past me to enter the Three Broomsticks. My enthusiasm was dimming, and now I was searching for Derek's dark head that would be bobbing up and down in the crowd any minute now.

But then ten more minutes past, and I'm curled up on the bench not caring if the rain from the previous day was seeping through my skirt. My eyes continue to look for him. Maybe he was just held up? I pull my legs closer to my body, making sure no passing perv could get a view of my underwear, and rubbed my arms to keep warm.

_Maybe he got detention?_ I think desperately after another ten minutes of no show. There was no more crowd – everyone was inside somewhere, trying to get out of the rain had started to pour down. I closed my eyes, and didn't move from my spot. The rain seared my pale skin, but I couldn't bring myself to want to move. He could still make it right?

After twenty minutes, I lay down, my eyes still shut against the rain, and I clutch my stomach as my eyes burn and tiny tears slide down my cheek. He wasn't coming, he never was. And now my entire Hogsmead trip was ruined because of some stupid boy… I am such an idiot. He's probably off snogging some hottie, not even the slightest bit interested in me or where I am.

I should have known not to trust this guy. Like any guy as hot as Derek Wood would actually want a girl like me, someone average looking. He's a looker, and I'm…not. I'm just plain old Lily Evans, who will be able to snatch a guy based purely on looks. Heck, if my life depended on it, I doubt I could get a guy by pretending to be dumb and merely using my looks. And whoever thought otherwise was an idiot.

"Lily?"

I snapped out of my misery instantly, hope flaring in my chest. It grew and grew when I saw the dark hair and the muscles, but, just as quick as it had come, it popped, sending a wave of agony through my body.

"Oh," I mumbled, sitting back up but not unwrapping my arms from around my stomach. I felt like if I let go, I would break into little pieces. Note to self: _Never_ get so wrapped in a boy that he has this much power of you. You'll just end up with a broken heart for sure. "It's just you…"

"You make me feel so loved, Evans," James said, standing in front me. "What are you doing anyways? It's freezing out here and raining! Why aren't you inside?"

I didn't look up at him and didn't answer either. He would only voice my fears out loud and laugh at my stupidity.

"Come on, Evans," he said, more seriously now, and, to my horror he took the seat beside me, looking intently at my tear-stained face. "Seriously, is something wrong?"

I turned away, feeling more tears coming on, tears I didn't want anyone – especially Potter – to see. "I-It's…nothing. Just…Just g-go away," I said hoarsely, trying to swallow the sob building in my throat.

"Lily." My heart gave a tiny flutter when my name came out of his mouth so perfectly, so smoothly. He made it sound so much more beautiful than it really was, than I really was. "Are you…okay…?"

Gasping on a sudden cry, I shook my head, not able to keep it in any longer. He obviously wasn't going anywhere soon, and I didn't want to wait. I needed someone to be around while I let it out, and this frozen bench and sharp rain definitely wasn't helping.

"Lily, what happened?" he asked, and I gave a shudder when he suddenly reached towards me, pulling me closer with his strong hands.

Shaking my head, I gave one last, feeble attempt to keep the dam from breaking. It was a useless effort, and I realized it immediately when I felt a tear roll down my cheek. James' hand came out of nowhere once again, and wiped it from my face. I leaned closer into him, still clutching onto my sides. This was what I needed – just someone to hold me while I lost control of my emotions. That was all that this was; just pure comfort coming from someone who just so happened to be in the right place at the right time. I didn't need to tell him why I was this way just yet – I could wait until the tears were back under my control. It's not like it's any of his business anyways. But, seeing as he'd done me a favor he never expected to give, I guess I could tell him… But not until I regained my strong, confident self again and once again not care what Potter says when he tells me that I wasn't beautiful enough for someone like Derek. Only then could tell him what had hurt me so badly. Just not yet – the tears were still flowing and if he confirmed everything I'd feared, I knew that I would break in to pieces.

So, we stayed like that for longest time. It must have been a while because later I saw people beginning to leave, only few actually noticing James and I, but couldn't give a crap what they were whispering to each other, as if I didn't know it was me they were talking about. But, to my utter surprise, James only held onto me tighter, sending scowls the students' way, like he was daring them to say something. I smiled to myself, not quite able to reciprocate it on the outside, and, at some point, curled myself on his lap, my head resting on his shoulder. The rain had started to cease and became an annoying drizzle. But, even though the weather was horrible, James felt warm and comforting. His hand massaging my back in slow, soothing circles, and his other brushing my hair out my face whenever it fell from behind my ear or when a tear fell down my cheeks, he wiped it away immediately. I'd never known how sweet he could be, but now that I've seen this side of him, I found myself doubting everything once again. Everything about me, everything about my life, and everything that made me hate anything to do with Potter. It seemed like only days ago when I'd proposed we try being friends, but that didn't go too smoothly. But, perhaps with a few adjustments, we could make another attempt? I sighed contently, loving the thought of having him to comfort me whenever I was upset, and knew that friends was the right path for us to take.

"Lily," he murmured in my ear, and I smiled again at the way my name rolled off his tongue. "We should start heading back…"

I frowned, but began to stand up. The world spun in front of my eyes, and then the ground was rushing towards my face while I held out a hand to catch myself.

Two hands caught me just in time and spun me around to come face to face with James. "T-Thanks…"

He shook his head, a strange look on his face. "I don't trust you to be able to walk back."

"I'm fine, James, really, I can walk by my – Oh!"

Suddenly I was in the air, lying on my back with two arms underneath me. I looked at James' frowning face with a look of bewilderment and tried to get back down, but he ignored my protests and made his way to the castle with me in his arms. This was _not_ comfortable or right, but, much to my own distaste, I found myself loving every moment of it.

"It would be easier to carry you if you didn't squirm so much," he said, not gasping for air like he should be. For heaven's sake, he was carrying a sixteen year old girl up a hill to a castle that was still a little under a mile away. Either he took some kind of strengthening potion before coming to Hogsmead, or he was just an extremely strong boy. Feeling the large arms under my back, I blushed and realized just how strong he really was. Quidditch has done him good…

"You know, you're talking out loud," he murmured, and I looked up to see a smirk on his face. Oh god, had I really just said all of that out loud? I glared, and elbowed his chest, but his grin didn't go away and he didn't almost drop me either. Finally, when I realized he wasn't going to let me down any time soon, I decided to lock my arms around his neck – _only_ because I was scared of falling, I swear. He may be strong, but if he tripped or did something to make me fall from his arms, I wasn't going to go down alone. "So," he said, after few moments of silence. "Are you ever going to tell me what happened?"

I inhaled sharply, remembering exactly why I was in this situation – Derek. He'd forgotten me. And then James came to help me get me back into my right head. Should I tell him? Did I trust him with this, or would he go blab it to the whole school? I didn't want anyone finding out about this, not yet, and if he so much as whispered it to the wrong person, _everyone_ would know. But didn't I owe him? I couldn't just leave him without an explanation as to why I'd fallen apart in front of the Three Broomsticks for any by-passer to see… Right?

Taking a deep breath, I told him everything, making sure my tears were tucked safely behind my eyes where they wouldn't come out for a long time. I watched his face while I told him; it started with pity, then moved onto fury when I voiced my fears of not being pretty enough. "You are the most beautiful girl in the school!" he had said through gritted teeth. "Don't _ever_ think that you're not! Promise me you won't!" I promised quickly, and then continued on awkwardly from there. By the time I was finished, he looked guilty, angry, depressed, and in pain. I couldn't believe one person could feel so much at one time, but, like always, James found a way to prove me wrong (at least half the records I've seen at this school have been broken by the bloke.)

"He stood me up…" I choked, feeling another raid of tears coming in only seconds. "W-why did he do…

"Lily, I need to tell you something," he said, after setting me down at a bench in one of the empty corridors, looking anywhere but at me. "You can go ahead and be angry with me, but please just hear me out before you judge me."

My head cocked to the side in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

He swallowed and took my hands in his, setting my heart into a wild gallop. "Lily, I'm so sorry for doing this to you, but you need to know that Derek didn't-"

"Lily?"

I turned quickly away from James, my heart jumping into my mouth. I heard James curse under his breath, but I blew it off, only have eyes set on one person.

The person fell back a bit under my glare, but looked confused as well as frightened. "Lily, I-I'm so sorry!" Derek stammered, walking towards us. I noticed a purple bruise developing on his forehead and another on his arm. This boy has got nerve coming up to me with hickeys the size of a fist all over him. "Our date, I-I just…I was coming, I promise, but then… Well, I was…attacked…" he trailed off, probably realizing just how dumb his excuse was while I scowled, fire burning in my eyes.

I jumped up, pulling a nervous James with me. As I passed the git that had ruined my first date for me, I hissed, "Save it for someone who cares."

"Lily! I wanted to come, really, I did! But when I was in the third floor corridor, Linda Moorgold came out of nowhere and..."

"And what?" I spat, rounding on him. "You just _had_ to take up the opportunity to get a quick shag before meeting me for our date? What – did you get too caught up in it all to pay attention to the time?"

"I would _never_ do that, Lils!" he protested, grabbing my wrist to stop me from leaving again. I whipped out my wand, ready to hex his balls off, but before I could even mutter a spell, Derek was knocked backwards by some invisible force.

I turned around, finding a furious James walking over to Derek. "_Never_ touch her again, got that?" he growled menacingly, and I backed away, suddenly scared by the change in James' personality.

But all that disappeared when Derek looked at me helplessly from where he laid. I glowered down on him, my wand still ready to hex him if he got too close again. "Lily, please – just listen to what I have to say!" When I didn't answer, he took that as a sign to continue. Taking a deep breath, he started to talk again. "Linda she came out of nowhere, really, and took me by surprise. I tried to tell her I didn't want to get in the broom closet with her-" James snorted at this, but quieted when I sent him a questioning look. "-but she wouldn't leave me alone. Before I knew it, she had grabbed me, thrown me into the broom closet, but I was alone. Seriously, Lily, she just left, locking me in the closet! Nothing happened between us, I swear!"

My glare faltered, and for second I almost believed what he said. If it was true, I was going to kill Linda, and if it wasn't, I was going to kill him.

"Lily, believe me, I would never want to shag anyone but you," Derek added, almost begging for me to take him back.

"Derek, I-" I started, reaching for him.

"That's not what you told Linda!" James burst out, his face turning red with anger.

"_What?_" both Derek and I hissed, bewildered by the comment. What was James saying? How would he know what Derek told Linda? What was he getting at?

Realizing what he'd just said, he blushed furiously, eyes bulging. "Uh, I, er… Um…" was all he managed, and suddenly I knew this wasn't going to end well.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

JAMES P.O.V.

I stared, scared for my life, wide-eyed at Wood and Lily. "Uh, I, er… Um…" was all I could say, let alone _think_.

What the bloody hell was wrong with me? How is it that I _always_ seem to find a way to mess everything up? I was so close, _so close_, to finally winning her over, and then I end up ruining it all! If Wood hadn't come along, I just _know_ that she would have falling in love with me, and she would have realized what I realized years ago – that we were meant to always be together. But now there was no chance. I couldn't just tell them they misunderstood what I said – they would see right through that white-lie. I just had to face the truth, something the gods have been trying to make see for a long time now – I was never meant to love Lily Evans. It was all just a silly mistake that I made, and now we were both going to have to pay for it. I would end up with nothing, and she would end up with the embarrassing story of the boy who supposedly loved her more than his own life. She would tell the story to all of her children and grandchildren, while I rotted away as a hermit who couldn't find another girl to love.

Man, I was pathetic.

"James." Lily's voice awoke me from my reverie, and I refocused my attention on the matter at hand. My eyes met her hurt, confused emerald ones, and I knew there would be hell to pay for this little stunt I tried to pull. "James," she repeated again, her voice thick with the tears she'd cried earlier. "What…what do you mean? How do you know this?"

I gulped loudly, my gaze flickering back and forth between Derek's glare and Lily's pained expression. I couldn't answer, not with her looking so betrayed and Derek looking like he was going to murder me.

"What he _means_," Derek said, standing up and holding Lily's hand. The monster that always growled at their contact never came. I didn't deserve the right to be jealous, and the monster definitely agreed. "Is that he was Linda Moorgold. He was the one who shut me in the broom closet so I couldn't go on the date with you."

I shut my eyes, waiting for her to blow. I'd just ruined her first date and comforted her about it even though I was the cause of her misery. She'd trusted me for the first time ever, and now she found that it was a useless attempt. If she slapped me right then and there, I wouldn't feel anything like usual. Usually, when she does this, I feel a new wave of love for the fiery red head, but now…I wouldn't feel anything. The slap wouldn't be from annoyance, but from anger and pain. She was right – I really was a git.

But she didn't do anything. I opened my eyes again to find her staring at me, pure agony swimming in what used to be bright sea of shining green. Now it was gone, replaced by anguish and a murky green swamp took the sea's place. _This is all my fault_, I thought, thinking that I was about to kill myself for causing this beautiful creature so much pain. Why couldn't I have just let the girl have her date? Oh, yeah, that's right – because I'm a downright git.

"Lily, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you… I didn't want you to be with him; he's not good enough for you… But he would have cheated anyways. When I was Linda, I told him to meet me in the broom closet. He agreed, Lily! I'm not lying – I know you may think I am, but this is the truth, no matter the countless of times I've lied to you. He wanted to shag Linda Moorgold! He said it right to her face – well, mine actually – and told her he had the condoms ready! Really, Lily, this is the-" I blurted it out so fast, trying to make up for what I'd done, but she had left without a word, tears threatening to spill any second.

Derek gave me a triumphant smile, and shoved past me, knocking me in the shoulder. My eyes closed, wishing I could kill the guy. He would have cheated on her, but she wouldn't hear what I had to tell her. Who knows how many other girls he's been shagging? Maybe he really has snogged Moorgold in a broom closet. _And he'll do it again_, I realized, my stomach lurching in horror. He was still going to hurt Lily. She was going to hurt even more than she did now when she found out.

There was only one solution to this problem – I was going to have to make sure he never hurt her again. He didn't deserve her, yes, but she would break if she found out he's been shagging every girl in the school behind her back. And I owed her. I may not ever be able to have her myself, but I could make sure that the man she was with made her happy. Yes, that was what I would devote myself to doing from now on – making Evans happy. She could have whoever she wanted as long as they didn't hurt her, or else they would have me to talk to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When I reached the Great Hall the next morning, half of the Gryffindor table sent hateful glares my direction. I sighed, knowing all too well that I deserved it all. But the worst was when my three best friends gave me looks of disgust, not saying a word to me when I sat beside them. Sirius shook his head in disappointment; Remus ignored my presence and ate his breakfast; and Peter glared at me, as if I was a criminal. And I probably was. Lily was a well-liked girl at this school, and I was the reason she was hurting.

I looked around the table for her head, wondering how she was coping when someone spoke from behind me.

"She didn't come down to breakfast."

It was Rebecca and Alice. They were glaring at me with such distaste, but I didn't blame them. These were Lily's two best friends – of course they would be pissed at me. "I-Is she…okay?" I stammered.

_SMACK!_

"Shit!" I muttered, rubbing the cheek Alice had slapped.

"She is not bloody _okay_!" she hissed, and I could have sworn I saw smoke spilling from her ears. "You ruined her first date ever! You're the reason she even got a guy with enough guts to ask her on date, seeing as you curse any guy who even _thinks_ of asking her anywhere, and now you decide to be the reason she thought she got stood up! Do understand how depressed she is right now? She won't move from her bed!"

"I-I'm sorry!" I squeaked, not feeling the normally tough guy inside of me anymore. Usually he was here in moments like these. Had he left too?

_SMACK!_

"Bloody hell!" I gasped, my other cheek burning from Rebecca's slap.

"You're a sick bastard, you know that?" she cried. "I swear, Potter, you go near our friend again, and we will hex you balls off!"

I watched, knowing that everything they said was true, as they left to go back to the common room. How was I ever going to fix this mess?

Looking down the table again, my eyes rested on Derek. He was grinning like an idiot, and staring at something. I look closer and realize he's staring at Marcie Jebsted's chest while she whispered something in his ear seductively. I glare and watch as she stands and leaves the Great Hall and seconds later he does the same.

Operation Make Lily Happy now initiated. If Derek wants mess around with the whole of the female population of the school, then he's making a big mistake. He was going to pay for hurting Lily Evans – I would make sure of that.

* * *

**A/N: Like? Hope you do!**

**Next chapter are probably going to be taking longer to get up because school is starting tomorrow (ugh!) But I will try to make sure they get up in a timely matter! Thanks for reading everyone! Love ya!**


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